Surviving the Writer's Guild Strike

How in the world am we supposed to get our daily political news, without Jon Stewart's team of incredible writers on hand to fill me in on what's going on around America? Don't the people at Comedy Central realize that so many of us, especially the generation following in my wake, have come to rely on "The Daily Show" to get a glimpse and a take on the day's political events?

Can the country long survive without Jay Leno or David Letterman mercilessly lampooning and harpooning our politicians for their current gaffes? Will Bill Maher be reduced to another failed attempt at acting? Can NBC or CBS stock prices handle the loss of advertising brought in by their late night bad boys?

How will we make it, without Britney Spears' latest self-destructive exploits being flashed on our television screens, sans any witty banter or commentary? Will Lindsey Lohan's talentless career go further into the toilet without the media attention? Will the mullet make a sneak run back into popularity without the cast of Saturday Night Live continuing to show us the error of the redneck coif?

Are all of this season's episodes of South Park already in the can, or will we suddenly be reduced to watching reruns of The Simpsons? Horror against horror - will Beavis and Butthead be brought back? Will we ever find out how Earl resolves his issues on King of the Hill?

Will we suddenly find YouTube's amateur submissions making their way from internet transmission to broadcast and cable? And what will become of Survivor:China - will they suddenly find themselves on Gilligan's Island, marooned for all television time? Will the latest contestants on American Idol find their careers stalled at the edge of the break point, and forced to return to their jobs waiting tables?

And let's think of poor Katie Couric at CBS. Will she refuse to write her own news stories? Will the other anchors, co-anchors, visiting anchors, and correspondents have to stand dumb in front of a camera, not uttering a word, until the allotted time for the story has passed? Will NPR be far behind?

How can these writers continue to strike, knowing that they are putting the very fabric of democracy on the fire, just because they are being screwed by the studios and production companies? What about the rest of us, who will receive a respite from the constant hammering of inanity for a few weeks or months? How are WE supposed to survive?