SXSW Survival Guide for Adults

Hat. Boots. Earplugs. Aspirin. This ain't my first time at the rodeo. Every March since 1996 has marked my attendance at the SXSW International Music Festival here in Austin, Texas. Following is a survival guide of sorts from an insider; tips from an actual Austinite.

In my 14-year experience of wearing a festival badge around my neck like an albatross, there have been the obligatory highs and lows. SXSW is manic, if it is anything. There is a lot of screaming, shouting, clapping, walking, eating, drinking, deciphering schedules, waiting in lines. Did I mention drinking?

I can vividly recall a few year's back when a friend and I had two hours to kill in between an impromptu rooftop performance by the Trashcan Sinatras and another by Erykah Badu at the Austin Music Hall a few blocks away. We ducked into the Spaghetti Warehouse at 4th and Colorado to waste some time and foolishly proceeded to eat two dozen fried mozzarella sticks accompanied by copious amounts of beer. This caused so much intestinal discomfort that we both missed the Badu concert outright and had to retreat home for the night to nurse our self-inflicted wounds. So much for the best laid plans.

Another year, it rained so hard that people were literally floating down 6th Street in a sea of yellow ponchos and makeshift newsprint bonnets that turned into mushy black and white wigs even before the first guitar chord was strummed.

Of course there are the highlights too, the things that keep us coming back year after year: I have sung along with Joe Jackson, reached out and touched Morrissey's hand, stood next to Tori Amos and watched in awe as Tony Bennett crooned "The Best is Yet to Come" to a bunch of kids who were more interested in figuring out what time the White Stripes would take the stage.

I have seen Beth Orton, twice, and missed Amy Winehouse once. I have watched Willie Nelson sing "Whiskey River" and was inspired to order a Jack Daniels from the bar just because.

When the Indigo Girls sang "Closer to Fine" under a starry sky in the Stubb's Bar-B-Q amphitheater with 2,000 of my closest friends, it was clearly a testament to the collective power of music and SXSW as the figurative cathedral for five days of worship every March.

This year promises to be equally as religious. And dry.

The forecast is for sunny skies, highs in the mid 70s and lows in the 50s. As far as dressing goes, the trend has always been Austin casual. T-shirts, jeans, blazers and cardigans for night, as well as the ubiquitous Chuck Taylors and cowboy boots. Anything goes here in the capital city. One word of advice: layer. It can get pretty heated during the day, and chilly at night, so be prepared.

Since Austin is laid out on an almost perfect grid system, it is fairly easy to navigate the city streets and find the concert venue you are searching for. Keep in mind that all east to west thoroughfares are numbered while north to south streets are named after famous Texas rivers like the Sabine and Neches. For those with an iPhone, I highly recommend downloading the my.sxsw app, which will allow you to review the full SXSW lineup, store personal schedules, follow friends and directly map showcase locations with directions.

There is even a Web site dedicated solely to free food being offered all week, from breakfast to Taco Bell tacos to all-you-can eat cheeseburgers, all free for the taking.

Consider your phone to be the Swiss Army knife of your survival kit while here in Austin.

In an effort to avoid the cellular gridlock that has characterized the last few years, AT&T has reportedly bolstered its network capabilities to handle the influx of visitors and unusually high data transmission by adding temporary cell towers and adding booster antennas in previous lost coverage vortexes like the Austin Convention Center.

As far as transportation goes, you will quickly familiarize yourself with the pedicabs that are readily available on every street corner in downtown Austin. These open air cabs powered by bicyclists are usually donation-only, and can mean the difference in making it to your Suzanne Vega showcase on time or having to hear the concert from a hot dog cart outside.

With hundreds of acts slated to perform over five days, picking and choosing who to actually see may prove the hardest decision of all. Some personal favorites this year include She and Him, Estelle, Margaret Cho, Kat Edmonson, and Macy Gray.

Making a glorious reappearance again this year is Maki Renka, a Japanese "Marilyn Monroe" who sings Broadway show tunes and songs made famous from 60s cinema. However, the showcase I am most anticipating takes place Friday night at the Austin Music Hall.

In what can best be described as a Motown hootenanny, Detroit crooner Mayer Hawthorne opens the set at 7 p.m. followed by Austin locals Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears. At 9 p.m., Raphael Saadiq takes the stage, paving the way for Smokey Robinson and Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings at 9 p.m. and 11:30 p.m. respectively. The only person missing from the lineup would be Diana Ross, but hey, you can't have it all. This set is as close to Berry Gordy perfection as I've ever seen at SXSW.

Get plenty of sleep, drink lots of water, dress in layers. And I did mention aspirin, right?