Talking About Sensitive Topics in School

Remember that if you are a school teacher you are only partly acting like the parent or guardian. A great deal depends on the question that is being asked, how comfortable the teacher, parent, guardian is when discussing the sensitive topic and what the reasons are that prompted the child to ask the question in the first place.

If a child asks "Where do babies come from?" then your response may be one that simply discusses the way that a father and mother form a family and make a decision to have a child. Older children may be asking this question because they are reaching puberty. A child may simply be trying to get some affirmation that they came from somewhere and/or that they were wanted.

Tip One: Don't simply think the child is wants to know everything about sex. Even adults don't know everything about sex, so it would be impossible for us to conclude that we could answer that type of question. It is important to ask some questions without saying more than is appropriate and to listen carefully to the answers.

Tip Two: You might ask questions that help you find out if they have discussed the topic with others, their parent/s, guardian, friends, others and this may give you some way to identify the possibility that they are receiving some accurate or inaccurate information. Accurate information can be vital and inaccurate information could be deadly. The spread of disease is in part the result of inaccurate information and behavior.

Tip Three: You may want to get more information first. It is reasonable to say that you will need to do some research and then you can discuss this topic again, but set a time frame for the next discussion. This depends on the nature of the question. If a teenage young lady is feeling pressured by her boyfriend to have sex, then this could be a topic that must be discussed with some urgency. This is the type of discussion that may require some professional assistance. Guidance departments and nurses are trained to discuss such topics with clarity and accuracy. Teachers are typically not trained to discuss such topics, but professionally they can find appropriate individuals that are trained.

Tip Four: Sometimes children ask questions because more serious conditions exist and in some cases potential child abuse. Teachers are required by law to report any suspected child abuse. They can report this without giving their name. It is not sufficient to report this to another department at the school although this may be a first step. If the teacher has reason to believe there has been child abuse, they must report it and can tell outside agencies that they have also reported it to school officials.

Tip Five: Keep it confidential. Even if a child asks a question when others can hear the question being asked it does not mean you have reason to believe it should be answered in public. In biology class, some sex questions can appropriately be answered openly because they would be discussed as part of the subject matter some questions would not be answered normally as part of the subject matter.

Tip Six: Do not overstep your personal or professional responsibility. You are not an investigator and you probably do not have the whole story in any situation. In general if you are a teacher, your primary duty is to teach the mandated subject matter, not to discuss personal or sensitive issues. This does not mean you should not listen and take appropriate actions.

Tip Seven: Follow up your referral to others. If you have moved the discussion of the sensitive topic to the guidance department, then check back with that department about the possible resolution. It may be sufficient for that department to tell you it has been resolved.

Because I was a biology teacher for many years I was asked many questions which could be considered sensitive. If it was related to the subject matter I would answer as honestly and completely as possible. If it was outside my area of knowledge, I would sometimes say to the children that although I could not properly discuss that topic, I would make an effort to find someone that could talk to them about that topic. Sometimes they would then ask and get a referral to the guidance department or to others that might help. Don't forget that the nurse can possibly come to your classroom and discuss some topics. A guidance counselor can possibly also make a presentation and so can a "resource officer". You may learn something in the process also when these professionals come to your classroom.