Tattoo Ideas for Nerds

Skulls, Celtic knots, butterflies and naked women. The world is full of bad tattoos. Most "how to pick the right tattoo" articles focus on the obvious: avoid flash (the pre-made designs on the wall) and make sure to check the portfolio of the artist. All good advice, but what if you're the sort who would rather spend the day at the library than riding a Harley? Not to worry - tattoos are for you too. Body art designs for nerds can be found everywhere from the pages of your favorite book to the natural history museum.

Quotes

The obvious tattoo choice for nerds of a literary bent is the "favorite quote." The trick here is to avoid anything that was required reading in high school. Shakespeare's "out, out brief candle" has probably been inked onto the backs of teenage goths worldwide. Instead, try Yusef Komunyakaa or Algernon Charles Swinburne. The key here is to choose a design that has personal meaning, while still being obscure enough to look intellectual.

Hint: Avoid including the source of the quote in your tattoo design. That way, when someone asks who wrote it, you can act shocked that they don't know.

Constellations

Emo kids everywhere are tattooing their bodies with stars. Luckily, you don't have to listen to whiny music or dye your hair black to have a celestial body art design. All you have to do is turn to your star chart. (Just avoid zodiac signs at all costs.) The truly ambitious nerd might decorate herself with the entire winter sky.

Hint: Include the names of the largest stars in the constellation, as well as the lines connecting the individual stars. This gives the design a more scientific appeal.

Fossils

It's no secret that nerds love dinosaurs. While body art of a living dinosaur is likely to look cartoonish, fossils have a certain scientific air to them. A fossil tattoo should have a subtle, classy color scheme. Fossil designs are ideal for those who want to avoid a garish, multi-colored tattoo.

Hint: Think beyond Triceratops. Consider a tattoo featuring more obscure prehistoric creatures, such as trilobites or ammonites.

Beyond Kanji

Everyone has seen a Japanese tattoo, and more often than not, the characters actually mean "tree stump" when the owner of the tattoo thought they meant "stability." With that in mind, please remember to always have foreign language designs checked by a native speaker or expert in the subject. Luckily, nerds often have friends who are professors of obscure dead languages, or at least internet acquaintances who are. With knowledge like this available, nerds in need of tattoo designs can skip the Japanese and go straight for Sumerian cuneiform.

Hint: Ancient languages are generally safer, since you won't be encountering a native speaker.