Teaching Children Etiquette

Teaching children proper etiquette does not have to be a difficult task filled with dread. Instead, look at it as a daily way of life. Something that is taught and reinforced daily. Here are a few things to keep in mind while training your children in etiquette.

Lead by example. Children learn more by watching the adults that they trust. If you are a parent, teacher, or other mentor in a child's life, please be aware that they are watching you. Everything that you do. If they witness you treating others rudely, being dishonest, swearing at crazy drivers, and losing your cool at the drop of a hat, then they are likely to fall in your footsteps.

Teach them to say please and thank you. This is a basic standard of etiquette that can be taught at a very early age. Tell them thank you whenever they hand you something, or are helpful in some way. Teach them that when making a request to others, that they use the word please. It's not necessary for adults to always say please to a child when making requests, however. And that is another part of teaching them etiquette: to show respect to adults, and understand the difference between interacting with adults and their own peers. Explain that there are different sets of rules.

Encourage them to always make others feel comfortable or welcome, and to extend proper courtesy. Children around 8 or 9 and up should be taught to hold doors open for the elderly, or help them in any way that they are able if an opportunity presents itself. Even children as young as 4 or 5 can be taught to show manners towards their friends by sharing toys when appropriate, not hitting or showing disrespect towards their peers, and not name calling.

Basically, I have learned that children usually live up to the expectations that are set before them. Make sure that you clearly communicate your expectations to your children, and reinforce it. At the dinner table practice speaking politely, chewing food with mouths closed, saying please and thank you while passing food, not interrupting others when they are speaking, not speaking with food in their mouth, etc. These are things that can and should be taught at home, and practiced and reinforced on a daily basis. Only through continual practice, does proper etiquette begin to become a natural way of life for your children. It becomes second nature, and you don't have to worry about them behaving like little monsters once they step foot in someone else's home.