Teen Mom Season 2 Episode 6 Recap

So we're back with a Teen Mom recap after a well deserved week off. And overall, I kind of like this episode. For one thing, the focus wasn't on the hellbeast known as Amber (who, by the way thinks I'm a jealous hater) and we rejoice at the return of the Bellman Lineman Camp Tshirt. Every time I see Gary in that thing, it sort of reminds me of Al Bundy reminiscing about the ol' High School glory days. Then I get a chuckle when I think of Amber as Peggy Bundy. Well on her way with that ill-fitting headband/bump-it combo she insists on wearing.

But I'm getting ahead of myself being such a jealous hater and all....let's start from the top. I might be missing some things, but that's because I covered them in last week's preview. Read about it there :)

Maci

So Maci and Kyle are in lurrrve, and it's all shiny and happy. Yay teenagers. Now, Maci is a little bass-akwards about this whole relationship thing. She thinks that she needs to relocate closer to Kyle to make the relationship work, because **sigh** he lives a whole two hours away. Now those of use who've been around the block once or twice know the converse is true. Long distance is the test... but what do I know? I'm just a jealous hater, bwahaha!

Anyway, we're all bored to tears watching Maci wrestle with the whole idea of moving to Nashville and all that boring stuff. I LOVED when she told her friends that she was moving and they all simultaneously went, "the hell?" ...priceless.

Oh, Maci, Maci, Maci...you've got a good thing going, and Kyle knows he's dating way above his level, just sit back, finish school and for the love of all things HOLY do not major in journalism...

Farrah

I hate myself for loving her, but I just do. Out of all these punks, she's the only one supporting herself, working, and about to finish school. Not to mention, she's not folding clothes at The Gap, she's a line cook. That's hard work.

So because she's such a dingbat, she's in the hole about $3k because of the Craigslist scam, so she has to pick up more hours. Good for her. Her friend is babysitting, and that was cute. This awesome friend also suggests "speed dating" for Farrah..which gives us the best line ever in this series...even better than "Have a picnic life, b!tch"...

"Sounds like meeting a lot of losers very quickly."

DYING. I like her more and more each week. So Farrah does the whole speed dating thing, and she came up with a couple of duds that look like they call Mom's basement, home. Now the PT assistant guy was the best choice, but not for Farrah. She's still waiting for DJ Pauly D to call her back.

That was fun. Farrah has decided to not worry about guys right now, and just put her head down and work.

Catelynn and Tyler

Oh LAWD. Where to start. This week was mostly centered around Catelynn and the hot mess she calls her family. Turns out Papa Meth, Catelynn's stepdad, and Tyler's dad (I know, I know) got ordered to rehab. Obviously Butch isn't spending all his time in church. We also learn that Butch likes the cocaine.

I about fell over laughing when the Rehab tech is like, "Crack, right?" and Butch is all "no, no the good stuff", and the tech is, "but not crack?".

Not to laugh at anyone's problems, but c'mon. Coke is expensive, and Papa Meth is called that for a reason.

Back at the ranch, Catelynn's mom, only in her late 30's (yikes) is going all cray-cray without Butchy-poo. So she decides to use Catelynn as the nearest whipping post. And poor Catelynn is so resigned and used to it she barely even reacts. Now granted, Catelynn should wash a dish or two and quit being such a sloth, but the kid's probably depressed as all get out. I'm depressed watching it.

The story is tied up neatly with this being a primne example of why Carly needed to be put up for adoption to have a better life. So sad. I would adopt Catelynn in a heartbeat. I really hope she pursues her Nursing Career after High School.

Amber

Oh, my beloved email writing machine, Amber. You see, I am horribly jealous of Amber, so remember that when I write this. I'm a hater.

Stop laughing. I was just thinking about how awesome I'd look with a bump-it and stretchy headband.

So Amber wants to go to MySpace High for $365 and Gary tells her to knock it off and take the $60 GED test. Even the guidance counselor had that pained look of "Why God, WHY?" on her face when Amber's whining, howling and moaning about how much better a diploma is. The counselor is like, well it's moot if you get a college degree. Ha!

I saw the ginormous laptop at the apartment, but apparently Amber can only take the GED at the Lie-berry, 'cuz that's where all the book learnin' happens. Did you laugh too when she's like "I wish there was a pill to take to make me smart," and Gary's like, "Listen to Mozart and sleep with a book on your head for osmosis."

Then Gary said something to the effect that he wants to marry someone "on their game" which prompted one of Amber's patented "Watch what you say, Geeeeery" spazz fits. What'd he say? He has expectations for his future wife beyond laying in bed all day?!

And the more I see Gary in the 'Raider Tennis' shirt, the more laughs I have picturing him playing Tennis.

So shock of the century, Amber fails the practice test with flying colors. Prompting the announcement that she has to quit her excrutiatingly demanding, part time job wiping down tanning beds and selling lotion, so she can study and pass.

As of now..she still hasn't taken and passed it. 5 months later....

I know, I'm a hater.

And cue the wheezing and whining about how little Lorna Doone, has once again robbed her of her dreams... If it weren't for having Lucy Lemon, Amber would be a neurosurgeon by now!

I hate that. She keeps rewriting history so she can pin it on the kid. By the way, have you noticed how Leanna Luigi always acts like she doesn't know her parents whenever they're out in public? Smart kid.

No Amber you beast, you dropped out of school waaaaay before Leah was even conceived. So shut up. You messed up, just own it.

So that's all for this week. Next week we see Ryan get his knickers in a knot over Bentley's visitation and Amber and Gary break up AGAIN. Until then peeps...