Teens & Cell Phones: Parenting in the Texting Age

We live in a new age of high tech electronics and our kids are already there. How do we prevent the headaches of this new electronic age of high bills, emotional disconnect & a new and serious electronic crime?

Prevent high bills

Make sure your plan will ensure there are no surcharges & monitor usage. If you don't have an unlimited plan, make sure that your child understands how many minutes or texts they are permitted to use. Break it down--400 minutes a month is 13 minutes a day. Show them how quickly that will disappear. For younger kids, a phone that can only call you or 911 may be appropriate. For teens, most providers have ways to set limits so they are unable to text or call during class or while they are supposed to be sleeping. You can use these same blocks to prevent them from using more texts or minutes than you want them to. Teens can send hundreds of texts a day--make sure you're not paying for each one!

Budgeting time & texts on phones can help teach your children responsibility and the value of what they have.

Prevent electronic hypnosis.

You've seen them--a family sitting at dinner. They haven't seen each other all day. Everyone is talking, but not to each other. Mom & dad on their cell phones, reading newspapers or watching TV, teens texting so quickly you can't even see their fingers, little ones zoned out on cartoons.

Set rules about texting and media during family time & give yourselves a chance to unplug. Your family may not like it. You may not even like it, but this is the simplest and most basic part of being a family: existing together as a unit. These are the moments to make family memories--don't miss them.

Prevent crime.

We don't like to talk about it or think about it, but it's a reality. Sexting, or sexual texting is a hot topic across the country and in some cases can be illegal. This is a disturbing trend that all parents must be aware of. In a recent survey by the Campaign to prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, shocking statistics indicated that 48% of all teenagers have received sexually suggestive messages via text, email or IM while 39% have sent them. 20% of teens and 11% of young teens (13-16) have posted or electronically sent nude or semi nude photos or videos of themselves. For teens under 18, they can be arrested for distributing child pornography. Even if it weren't a crime, these images could resurface when your child is older and wreck havoc on the rest of his or her life. In this world of the internet, hardrives & Google, nothing ever disappears. The best idea is to make sure it never appears.

If your teenager has a cell phone that can receive pictures or texts, this is something you are going to have to deal with in the same way you would monitor their computer use. Talk to your kids, set ground rules and if they break them or use their phone in an illegal way, trade it in for one that doesn't have picture or text capability. Talk to your kids about sexting because someone will eventually--and that person may be someone asking your child for images of themselves.

Privacy is important to teenagers, but there are just some boundaries that you can't leave up. This is a brave new cyber world & helping our children navigate the rapids is simply our job as parents.

All statistics from Campaign to prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/sextech/PDF/SexTech_Summary.pdf