Ten Reasons Baseball Rules

Baseball is the greatest team sport ever invented. Here are ten reasons why:

1. No Clocks

Unlike football, basketball, hockey, and soccer, baseball is not constrained by clocks of any kind. This means that at no point is it impossible for a team to win a game.

Behind by three touchdowns with ten seconds left? Forget about it! Gotta have three 3-pointers as the clock winds down to 1.6 seconds remaining? Ain't gonna happen! Need 10 runs with two outs and nobody on base in the 9th? Not likely...but it is possible.

2. The History

Baseball has the longest and most romantic history in American team sports.

Nobody remembers players from past Super Bowls or Stanley Cup finals, but the phrase "Tinker to Evers to Chance" will live on forever.

3. The Ballparks

Every baseball stadium is unique. The dimensions to the fences, height of the fences, look, and feel of every park are different.

Show me a football field that is only 93 yards long, a basketball court with 11-foot baskets, or a hockey rink with ivy on the boards and we'll talk.

4. Statistics

It is true that statistics can be over-analyzed, but no other sport provides fodder for comparisons like baseball.

Many of the players who suit up in the National Football League produce no other statistics than their height and weight. What kinds of numbers can you come up with for a long-snapper? Baseball has statistics regarding everything for every player. In fact, if you play in only one game, go hitless, and commit three errors, that wonderful performance will forever be stored away in databases for future baseball historians to marvel at!

5. No Penalties, No Fouls

The flow in sports like football, basketball, and hockey is constantly interrupted by penalties and fouls. Additionally, exciting moments are often erased because of them.

It is frustrating to watch a great punt return of 80 yards called back because some numbskull was caught holding clear across the field, or a 3-point jump shot waived off because the big, dumb center was in the lane for more than three seconds. In baseball, home runs-except in extremely rare circumstances-are never called back.

6. No Single Player Gets All the Action

A great running back like LaDainian Tomlinson can be handed the football on every play if the San Diego Chargers so choose. A deadly shooter like Kobe Bryant can take every shot for the Los Angeles Lakers-and sometimes he does!

Baseball, however, is an equal opportunity employer; the crappy players get as much playing time as the great ones. Albert Pujols has to wait his turn through the batting order before he can come to the plate again. Likewise, a dominant pitcher like Johann Santana only pitches every fifth day.

7. You Get to Keep the Ball

Through the course of every baseball game, dozens of balls are hit into the stands-and the fans get to keep them as souvenirs.

The National Football League is so cheap, they actually put up a net behind the goalposts anytime a field goal or extra point is attempted. And you are far more likely to see a player go into the stands during an NBA game than a basketball. Sure, plenty of hockey pucks go into the stands, but who the hell wants a puck?

8. Normal-Sized People Can Play

Yes, it's true that normal-sized people can play hockey and soccer too, but let's face it; nobody cares about hockey and soccer. The only sports that rival baseball in popularity are football and basketball-two sports that only genetic freaks get to play.

In football, offensive linemen under 300 pounds are referred to as too small and quarterbacks under 6'2" are thought of as being too short. Of course they're too short! They have to be able to see over the massive mountains of humanity that are blocking for them!

Basketball? Six-foot-10-inch human telephone poles play a position that is actually called "small forward." Enough said.

9. The Good Old Summertime

Most of the football season occurs during a period when the weather is cold, crappy, and depressing. Basketball and hockey are also played in the dead of winter-not that it matters, since both sports are played indoors.

The main portion of the baseball schedule is played in the comfort of summer. There is nothing like sitting in the bleachers on a warm August night, drinking a few beers, and root-root-rooting for the home team.

10. The Game is Truly Unique

Football, basketball, hockey, and soccer all have the same basic idea: The offense takes the ball or puck and attempts to put it in or across the opponent's goal, basket, or goal line. The opponent's defense attempts to stop the offense from doing that. Not a whole lot of originality there.

The defense actually controls the ball in baseball, and the offense does its best to get the ball as far away from the goal (home plate) as possible!