Ten Reasons Why You Should Not Buy the CD/Radio & Sound Soother from Sharper Image

I believe Sharper Image has figured out the perfect way to screw people with their CD/Radio & Sound Soother With Aluminum Cone Speaker Technology. This product is not quite as bad as their Ionic Breeze Dashboard Ionizer, but it's almost as bad.

I thought this player would be perfect to bring with me when I travel because it would give me something to listen to in the hotel (I don't usually like to watch TV when I'm on vacation), and would help me sleep at night because it has the famous Sharper Image Sound Soother library included. I'm one of those people who needs pretty sounds in order to go to sleep, and I always wanted to try out the Sharper Image ones because their description of them sounds so wonderful, and they have so many different sounds to choose from.

Unfortunately, the product did not work as espected. Following are the ten reasons I hate this product, and consequently the ten reasons you probably won't want to bother with this worthless piece of junk. The reasons not to buy the player are in order from least to most important.

10. It uses two different types of batteries that don't last long enough. It uses six AA batteries, and a button battery. This may be good in a way because the button battery keeps the clock running while you switch out the other batteries, but the button battery they provide you with seems to be old, and dies very soon after you start using the player. The other batteries only last a couple of hours each time you use the player, which is really annoying since there are a whopping six of them to replace.

9. The ear buds that come with the player are extremely cheap, and don't sound good. The player is supposedly really high quality, and has great speakers, and a wonderful rich sound. It's also very expensive. So why would Sharper Image include really cheap ear buds with bad sound quality with the player? They could at least include cheap ear buds that have good sound quality.

8. It's really heavy for its size. You would expect that a portable CD player would be lightweight so it does not weigh down your luggage. That is how most portable CD players are, so I don't know what Sharper Image is doing with their player to weigh it down so much, but whatever it is, it's obviously not working well for them.

7. The case is cheap and has no handle. The CD player itself is expensive and looks like it's made really well, so why would they give you such a cheap case to put it in? Sharper Image should give you something to protect your investment. Instead, they give you a case that is really difficult to open and close, and difficult to carry. Since it has no handle, it can slip out of your hands easily, especially since the player itself is heavy.

6. All the ambient sounds are very similar. Sharper Image writes so much in their catalog and on their website about their famous Sound Soothers, and about how their sound library is of great quality, and about what a great variety of sounds they have. In my opinion, all their sounds sound like basic white noise. You can get a stand alone sound machine or ambient sound CD much cheaper, with a much bigger variety of sounds, and with much better quality sounds.

5. It's surprisingly hard to use. The controls don't really make sense the way they do on most portable CD players. I don't really want to have to read the manual in order to use it. It's just a CD player! I should be able to just take it out and start using it.

4. It's way overpriced for what you get. It was originally over $200 when I bought it, but is now selling at a lower price of $149.95 on the Sharper Image website. There are many other portable CD players out there that are much cheaper and work way better. There are so many examples. The only drawback is that you don't get the Sharper Image Sound Soother library with the other players, but you can buy a nice portable CD player and a great sound machine or ambient sound CD to play in the player that are better and cost less in total than the Sharper Image player.

3. The digital display stops working properly after a few weeks. It's supposed to show displays for various modes, but after awhile, it displays nothing but the time.

2. All CDs play in the player, but for some reason, they stop producing sound. The CDs will work on other players, but not on the Sharper Image one.

1. This one is by far my favorite of the list: The player stops working completely just after the return period expires. I'm not sure if they planned it out exactly, but in my case, it stopped working two days after the expiration date. It's as though Sharper Image is saying, "We got ya sucka!!"

I have this image of the folks at Sharper Image sitting around having fun coming up with the funniest and most innovative ways to screw their customers. In my vision, I can see someone saying, "What if we install a chip that automatically dies two days after the expiration date so they have to replace the product unless they buy our overpriced 3-Year Replacement Guarantee that costs one third the price of the product itself," then they all squinch up their faces as let out evil giggles with possessed, evil red beady eyes and horns on their heads.