Ten Ways Not to Have a Good Time on Your Next Camping Trip

I've actually seen all of these things happen in campgrounds and thought I would share with you the ten ways NOT to have a good time on your next camping trip.

1. Bring a large boom box and blare it so loud you can't hear any birds or any other natural sound, much less your neighbors telling you to turn it down. (Act like you are in your own house, you know, the one with walls.)

2. Complain about all the dust, bugs, dirt, toilet facilities, and anything else your brain can come up with. Gripe about the weather - too hot, too rainy, too muggy, too cold...

3. Talk real loud around the campfire until late at night / early in the a.m. This is especially effective if you add booze, and the Park Police have to come, especially if they come enough times to throw you and all your gear out of the campground in the middle of the night.

4. In a rainstorm, keep changing your clothes into something dry until all the clothes you brought are soaking wet. Then realize there are no dryers in the woods.

4a. Suddenly realize that although you have a clothesline, it takes forever to dry out clothes in a rainstorm.

5. Make a campfire so huge it lights up the whole campground and singes your tent / sneakers / hair.

6. Lock yourself out of your car.

7. Forget to bring _________ (the tent, sleeping bags, flashlight, etc. See camping checklist for more.)

8. Leave an open knife sitting on the ground right where everyone walks. Or do a little carving and slip, carving right into the calf of someone passing by.

9. Pitch your tent over / under / next to ___________ (an ant or wasp nest / a branch that falls in the middle of the night / a river or lake prone to flooding)

10. Tear living limbs off trees for your campfire and then try to light them in a campfire. Better yet, burn some nice dry wood and later find out it's poison ivy and can get into your lungs.