Ten New Years Resolutions for Kevin Federline

K-Fed had a very, very public year. From having another child with Britney Spears to his album and the very public divorce that's going on, it seemed too appropriate to come up with a few ideas for resolutions to make his 2007 better than 2006.

10. Vasectomy

Seriously, you have how many children? Four? Okay, you've bred, we understand your body works fine. Now do everyone on the face of earth a favor and stop. You have an ample amount of children and you should be proud of that. Just do us all a favor and prevent any more children. Four is a great number and one to feel proud of. It isn't a proud thing to state you have x children by several women, y'know? In fact, it makes you seem almost like a deadbeat. Do we know for a fact you pay attention to all your children like they are deserving of? No, we don't. Vasectomies don't make you less of a man, no. Wipe that notion away. Consider it a way you'd never have to use a condom again (not that you ever have used one by the proof of children) and a way to be considered mature.

9. Lose the image

It isn't cute. I don't know why you think your tough guy style is what being a rapper is about. It isn't, never was and never will be. A lot of those guys dress that way because it's who they are. I doubt many of them were backup pop princess dancers like you were. I don't know what style you're exactly going for, but if it's rich ghetto poor then it really isn't doing you justice. You aren't that bad looking a guy if you'd just clean up and lose that image. It, if anything, is holding you back. I'm unsure if this is a good thing or bad thing, but whatever the case, the style isn't you.

8. Stay Single.

You're a still young, divorcing father of four. You don't need to bounce into a relationship this year. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt when you claimed your love for Britney so I'm hoping it takes you a while to get over her, heal and be READY for an adult relationship later on. Focus on being a dad, a good dad that is, to all of your children for the sake of their health and happiness. Spend your time with them instead of a girlfriend who may or may not work out. Once you get into a great, productive relationship with your kids then you can perhaps consider a new relationship. But take your time, man. Being in a relationship isn't a must do.

7. If you HAVE to sing.. Get Singing Lessons

I mean real, legit singing lessons. Not how to rap 101. I don't think you're the next Eminem out there and you're failing miserably in what you do. I know you probably have gotten that taste of fame from your "career" as a dancer and now as a rapper, which is fine. However, first I'd urge you to aquire some real talent that's suiting to you before trying to be the next big thing. You aren't a rapper, this is obvious. While rap is known for being a little more on edge than other music genres I doubt that includes singing about peanut butter and jelly. Also, you're well off. You can afford these lessons, so get 'em.

6. Clean up

You always look so dirty! I don't mean this in any negative way. But every time I have seen you and that's including when you're not performing, you look like this dirty, careless man. That, if you eventually hope to get into a relationship someday, isn't going to be a good thing. Shave, wash up and lose the dirty-ness to you that's been a part of who you are since you've been known. I think you looked pretty good the one time I do recall you being clean. Besides, just like it is with girls, being positive about how you look will reflect onto others.

5. Two words: Shoe laces

Every public picture I've seen of you shows you wearing sneakers that look brand new and the lack of shoe laces. I'm beginning to question your ability to tie shoes. This is not trendy. In fact, it looks downright stupid if you want an honest opinion. It makes you look lazy, scrubby and just plain blah. How can you walk in those, anyways? I'd be afraid of my shoe falling off mid step and having to backtrack every 5 steps. If you need shoe laces for those, let me tell you right now, any dollar store has them so there's no excuse not to wear them. However, if you can't tie shoes, ask your local kindergarten teacher. I'm sure they'll help you out.

4. Lose those hats

Hat hair is disgusting. I have only seen one instance of you not wearing a hat. Let me tell you, they're disgusting. I doubt you wash yours daily for as long as you wear it and that sweaty grossness that hats tend to collect don't look "cool" or smell that decent in the long run. Besides, have you ever seen what happens to hair if you constantly wear hats? You get this divot that is just horrible. It tells quite clearly you wear hats. Besides, do you think any girl likes having to kiss a guy with a hat poking into her forehead? Uhm, no? You have hair and it looks rather nice without a hat. More of this and less hat.

3. No more tattoos

Okay, I'm not one to go against freedom of expression, however you look disgusting with those tattoos on your arms. Seriously. They're big, gaudy and just all together a nasty eyesore. I love body art, but there comes a time when it becomes as common place as ear piercing that it just loses its meaning. I know you know what a tramp stamp is, Kevin. Those are ridiculed now and once were considered trendy. Stop while you still have actual skin showing. In fact, you may wish to consider removing some of those tattoos. One or two is fine, if they're small. But you have totally over done it.

2. No more albums, please.

Kevin, Kevin Kevin. Your album is horrible. Accept that you aren't a rap artist and move forward from this realization. I'm sure somewhere within you there is talent beyond backup dancer and it's just screaming to get out. I won't dive into what your talents might be besides procreation, but I'm certain you have one. And if dancing is your only talent, there are plenty of places you can dance that will wow people. Madonna went to New York City and was an incredible dancer, maybe she can hook you up with places to go for dancing. If anything else, try out for Juliard. If you're as talented in dancing as I've heard, you can go there.

1. No more "wife beaters"

You overwear these shirts in all seriousness. All I had to do was google your image and you see A-shirt after A-shirt. I'll give you credit. They're always clean and keeping them that way is near impossible. So you must have an allowance for these shirts weekly. They don't look good on you regularly. Once in a while, sure, tattoos a-blazing but when it becomes a common occurence it just loses its appeal and labels you as 'nasty'. I don't think you want to go through life being mistaken for a nasty redneck from the backwoods of .. wherever you're from. Shirts look good. Shirts can do wonders. You might even get a better job if you dress better.

Who knows what 2007 will hold for K-Fed. For one thing, he may just get custody of his children from Britney Spears, however, we'll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, whatever he choses to resolve for a new year I hope it's a good and suitable one that moves him in a positive direction.