Terrible Hair Stylist Etiquette
Three Things I Never Wanted to Hear While Getting My Hair Cut
I've always been wary of getting my hair cut by a stylist. After all, cutting hair isn't that hard, and I can cut my own hair into the style I want ninety percent of the time. I'm actually kind of a savant when it comes to cutting my own hair, but that's another story.
From time to time, I've enlisted the services of professional hair stylists. As a teenager, I thought it was great fun to plop myself down in an unfamiliar hair stylist's chair and say, "Surprise me!" I got some great haircuts that way, and I suspect I was the guinea pig for more than one Fantastic Sam's employee to vent his frustrated creativity. I've had everything from a mohawk to a steeply asymmetrical bob, and I've loved every one of my "surprise" haircuts.
On the other hand, a surprise haircut also means a surprise hair stylist. To preserve the theme of the unforeseen haircut, I never went to the same hair stylist twice. You can see what's coming next, right? Let's just say that although the haircuts were fun, some of my hair stylists were more socially adept than others.
It started with the woman who gave me the haircut that resembled a pixie cut in back and a graduated bob in front. I loved that haircut, which seemed to become popular in the late nineties before resurfacing again recently. The haircut was neat, but not the reason I'm telling you about this particular stylist. The point of this story is that this woman exclaimed, mid-haircut, "Wow! You've got such a hairy neck!"
Now, I'm mostly Hungarian, so the fact that my neck was this hairy didn't come as a total shock. The fact that my hair stylist seemed repulsed and surprised enough to tell the world was a bit shocking. Up until this point, I expected hair stylists to have a bit more tact when it came to other people's head abnormalities. I was proven wrong yet again when I asked my hair stylist (probably against my better judgment), "Is it the hairiest neck you've ever seen?"
She faltered a bit before answering, "Well…on a woman."
Okay, so I've got a really hairy neck. All the other hair stylists who cut my hair before her kindly shaved my neck in silence. This woman managed to make me insecure about my hairy neck for the last seven years of my life. I'm slowly getting over it, but no one's mentioned it recently.
On another occasion, a hair stylist (giving me a Billy Idol cut that I would later bleach blond) essentially told me my mother didn't love me. This is what she said, and I'll let you interpret what she might have meant.
Hair Stylist: "Wow! The back of your head is really flat!"
Me: "I have a hairy neck, too."
Hair Stylist: "Usually, I only see really flat backs-of-heads on my Asian customers. Their mothers don't carry them around everywhere like in the U.S., so their skulls develop a flatter shape in the back from being on the floor."
Me: "So…what does my flat head mean?"
Hair Stylist: "Your mother must have never held you, because the back of your head is really flat."
Okay, maybe I'm being sensitive, but a hair stylist really shouldn't talk about my mother like that! I cut my own hair for years after that one, mortified that future hair stylists would also notice the flatness of my head and speculate on my mother's lack of affection for me.
I just recently moved to Chicago, and I thought I'd get a haircut to celebrate my arrival. I've been growing my hair out for a while now, and I wanted a bit of style to go with my new length. Just my luck - the hair stylist I randomly chose was another one of those socially backward types who can't keep from making me feel bad about some aspect of my head.
Silly me always assumed that my thick hair was something to be proud of. My hair can sport a wide variety of haircuts and styles. My hair also grows quickly and doesn't get very damaged when I dye it. Apparently, thin hair is in this year or something, because my most recent hair stylist accused my thick, healthy hair of resembling a helmet!
While it's nice to get my hair cut by a professional stylist, I often don't think it's worth the grief. If I had to hear something derisive about my hair, head, or neck every time I got my hair cut, I would've started buzzing it off a long time ago. As it is, I cringe when I consider my next hair cut from a stylist. I've already got the hairiest women's neck in the world, the flattest American head, and a helmet permanently attached to my scalp.
Published by Esther November
Esther November is the pen name of a short fiction writer who has also written over 300 non-fiction articles for web and print media. She also teaches writing online for Ashford University. View profile
Need to Find a Great Hair Stylist in the Chelsea/Flatiron Neighborhood?In the fashion capital of the world I assumed I could find a great hair stylist immediately. Unfortunately, I was wrong. After trying various recommendations that didn't work I...- Maintaining a New Hair Dye Color or Hair CutBe picky when shopping for hair care products immediately after having your hair dyed or styled. Shop strategically and pick beauty goods to augment your look and maintain your style and color for a maximum period of...
- Hair Cut - LimerickA humorous limerick about a boy's response to his father telling him he needs a hair cut.
- Natural Celebrity Hair Cut Looks for 2009Natural hair cut looks made popular by celebrities
How to Cope with a Bad Hair CutA bad hair cut can be pretty upsetting and even annoying. Learn how to cope with a bad hair cut here.
- Tips for Getting the Most Out of Your Hair Appointment
- What Not to Say to Your Hair Stylist in the Beauty Shop
- Disney World Secrets: Get Your Hair Cut on Main Street in the Magic Kingdom
- Hair Stylist Relationships: With Committment Comes Benefits
- Jessica Simpson's Hair Stylist Ken Pav's Fails to Deliver with Sulfate Free Shampoo
- Should Hair Stylists Be Able to Deny Services?
- Dallas, Texas Hair Stylist Brandon Waggoner at Warren Wilkes Salon
- I have a hairy neck.
- My flat skull indicates my mother neglected me as a baby.
- My hair is so thick, it resembles a helmet no matter what I or my hair stylist does with it.
16 Comments
Post a CommentThanks for sharing your stories and I hope you find a more tactful stylist! :)
I really enjoyed your article.
Ella, lack of right hair dressers? what does that mean? maybe you have lack of education. Try being a leader and not so much of a follower
idk, I am sure the stylist did't say "wow, your neck sure is flat, or your neck sure is hairy:" the reason this auther of this story is so comfortabe with it is she more than likely prompted them in some way. It takes a really brazen person to just point out faults, and we are taught not to talk about clients faults, not good retention. Try reading between the lines and not listen to all the negative thing people say, thats whats wrong with this world....
First of all i am really sorry you have had bad experiences with stylists. Second it's even worse when you pick them by random at low end chop shops, then turn around and give all of us a bad name. No matter what the profession there are going to be unorthodox people. This certainly does not give you the right to judge. Try coming to a nice salon and continue going, you might be surprised with the amazing relationship you build with them. Third, i can just imagine what you look like when you cut your own hair. Its not very hard? Try cutting hair on someone like you. Give us a little more credit, idiot. It takes patience, repetition, tolerance, long hours on your feet, and caring about the person in your chair. Doing what ever it takes to make that person feel better about themselves. Obviously you've never been to someone like me, or other stylists like me, because you surely don't feel good about your self. Try a neck wax, thats probably what they were getting to, while you
The article isn't complaining about the hairstyles she received. She is actually complaining about the unnecessary comments that hair stylists feel the need to say about someone's hair, head or what have you. AND I agree with the article. Just like I don't go around the mall telling ppl what is wrong with them, body wise, it really isn't necessary for hairstylists to do the same. We are all sensitive about some aspect of ourselves so calling the author insecure is a stretch. She also puts some humor into the retelling of these stories which suggests she isn't that hung up on it. All the attributes being complained about in this article are things the author cannot control. SO DO THE HAIR (hairstylists)! to the best of your ability and move on. TIP: Leave the criticisms at home!
What I get from this article is somebody who is insecure and gullible. If you seriously want to complain about these hairstylist (that are really just normal people with scissors in their hands) then perhaps you should try to pur yourself in their shoes. Somebody sits down and tells you to "surprise them". That means that you have to suddenly become a mind reader. Would you go to a tattoo parlour and ask for a surprise tattoo? or a restaurant and ask for a surprise dish and expect them to know what you like and don't like. I understand that they should be able to tell whether or not something would look good on you, but to expect them to know what you like and don't is just foolish. As far as your insecurities go, maybe you should realize that if these were mean spirited comments, they wouldn't have said them outloud. They would have gone into the back room and told their other hairdressers about their ape-girl client in their chair. Be grateful for the things they say to your face. It
It' is not your mother fault. It's a lack of right hairdressers in america.
I'm not agree with Cindy. My hair is thin and frizzy, but with nice haircut, they laying down wonderful and style looks good even on my thin hair. I lived in USSR before I moved to USA. At that time, Sergey Zverev was just a regular hairdresser and I found him as the best hair stylist who made my hair look not just good, but perfect. People could turn around and look at me! I was getting attention from the public. Hair for woman means a lot in her appearance. You know that crowd always pay attension on people who looks pretty. In 1997, I moved to America, and now I suffer that I cannot find right hairdresser to make my hair look good and have haircut that I like.
Sergey Zverev became a very famous hairdresser who lives in Moscow and works with elite level of people. I wish each hairdresses to have the same skills, as Sergey has. His magic is that he never repeats haircut even if it the same style. I remeber that women did not tell him what style they want. The thing they
You also have to realize in our world talking openly about these hair qwirks of ours and our clients often brings laughter . It's socialy acceptable to poke fun of our bodies hair and skin at a salon. It's wierd it's just the way we act in salons, it's really not meant to be mean. Cutting hair is a learned art for most some are better some are worse you just have to find someone you like.