Testimonial of an Ascended Black Woman

The other day as I was leaving my office for my routine lunch-hour stroll , I overheard the white man ahead of me audaciously proclaim; "Everything's fine in the day until, at like, 12:30 in the morning, there's a bunch o' niggers smokin' weed on your stoop."

Now, we all know that when someone white uses the word nigger, as a Black person, you are expected to take immediate offense. I felt something, but it wasn't offended. I was angry, but not at the guy who was speaking. Instead, and perhaps somewhat ironically, my blood began to boil when I thought about the "niggers" he was referring to.

I don't know what sparked that remark but it surprised me that he didn't seem to care that he was surrounded by Black people who would have every right to be offended, and could have popped him in the jaw. Something else that was strange was his chivalry; he held the door open for me-a Black woman, who could have been related to one of those "niggers." It started me thinking. Apparently he made a distinction between the "niggers" smoking weed on the stoop and myself-the professional Black woman he had enough respect to hold the door for.

As I continued my walk, I thought about the term nigger , and I thought about how I would address this issue in my next diatribe. Quite frankly, the whole nigger/nigga argument is redundant. It has fallen on deaf ears. Everyone knows the history and legacy of this word and those of us who continue to use it obviously don't give a damn about themselves or their history. So, forget about it. I used to be one of those people who would shoot dirty looks to Blacks (or anyone) on the subway or in the street who used the term in my presence. I once asked a guy (who wasn't even Black) who was talking to his friend who was-to please stop using that term in my presence. He apologized and refrained. I got lucky that day. Since then, anyone I asked not to say it would simply ignore me, or find some other derogatory name to call me. So, I gave up my lonely crusade. I would still shoot dirty looks to semi-literate thugs who share my "race" and skin tone yet disrespect my ancestry but I suffered in silence turning my rage inward and against those "niggers" . I resented them for causing me to suffern in silence and that made me feel responsible for their ignorance, until I read an article in Esquire magazine entitled, "The Manifesto of Ascendancy for the Modern American Nigger," by John Ridley.

Ridley rightfully claims that there have been successes for Black people, since Jim Crow and Civil Rights but there are of course too many of us in jail, embracing the thug life- looking to drug dealers or rappers for social, economic and political leadership rather than taking advantage of the opportunities our true leaders sacrificed their lives for. He asks the question: "If we as a race could win the centuries-long war against institutionalized racism then why can't we secure the advantage after decades of freedom?"

Simply put, it's the niggers that are preventing us from securing our freedom! He goes on to say that he has no qualms about the word, and that it is in the English lexicon, and nothing will remove it from reality, even if you replace the last few letters with an a. Then he says it's time for us "ascended" blacks to wish niggers good luck. Whites don't feel responsible for the ills of their entire race, so why in the hell should ascended Black folks-those of us who embrace the successes and gains we have accomplished in our turbulent history, worry about niggers smoking weed on a stoop or those who cry racism instead of working towards overcoming it? He rightfully states that we should praise those of us who have transcended racism to achieve high levels of success: people like Condi Rice (regardless of what one thinks of her politics, the woman is brilliant-and has never shirked her responsibilities as a leader despite the numerous death threats she has received from white racists) Colin Powell, Ron Christie, Charlie Rangel, Barack Obama and a host of Black leaders who have ascended to highly visible and prominent positions in the American government and are fighting the good fight so that "niggers "won't have to cry racism if they get locked up or shut out. Sadly, niggers can name their favorite rapper (who aren't doing a thing for their people except exploiting them) quicker than they can name a Senator from their own state.

"Niggers" should think about this-is there any other race that allows themselves to be disrespected, dehumanized, or degraded the way Black folk do? "Niggers" allow themselves to be marketed, packaged and sold to the highest bidder much like the naked slave on the auction block.

You will never hear another race or ethnic group refer to or greet one another by a disparaging ethnic slur in public. Other marginalized groups respect their contributions to history and never take for granted the horrors or atrocities they have faced in the past. They will never let others disrespect them because they hold their culture and their race in high regard. Imagine what someone ignorant of the many contributions of African Americans to this country might think if hey happened to turn to BET for a taste of Black culture.

So I kept walking and thinking about the man and his remark about "the niggers smoking weed on his stoop," in a different context. I wondered what would make him say such a thing aloud without concern for who it may offend. Could it be that he recognized me as an ascended Black woman? I know I'm an idealist, but I'd like to think so. I suppose I'll never know, but thanks to Jim Ridley, I don't care what he thinks about niggers. I know who I am.