Thanksgiving and the Differences Between Family One and Family Two

Thanksgiving is just about here, right around the corner. We all know that after Thanksgiving seems a whirl of activity preparing for the holidays. Along with that activity many times comes a certain amount of self doubt and depression because we are focusing on what we're buying, not what we already have. Every year without fail people stress over what they are buying for who. With the rate of unemployment and the economy what it is this year, people will probably be stressing more than usual. Its time to get back to basics-family is what is important right now, not what you are buying them. I know this sounds funny after my series of Black Friday articles, but it is just a reminder that its more than Black Friday, and more than who gets to open what. Its about being there and appreciating what you have-no matter what your income level or religion or current perceived problems are.

One Parent's Perspective:

It is Thanksgiving, baby's first Christmas is right around the corner. They want to do it perfect.
Thinking ahead to the future, they try to begin traditions that will last.
Is the decorating just so?
How many will be enough presents under the tree?
It is the day after Thanksgiving and they're standing in line, they're worried if the presents they get will be fine.

Another Parent's Perspective:

Its Thanksgiving, Christmas is right around the corner. Baby's sick and you won't be home for Thanksgiving.
When they think of the future, they just can't imagine.
What is Thanksgiving going to be when they feel anything but Thanks?
They get angry when they hear other parents complain they can't buy just the right present.
They get angry when they hear of Thanksgiving family quarrels.
They wish that was the worst of their family's woes.
Their holiday wish is that they had their baby with them just a little while longer.

One Husband's Perspective:

Thanksgiving time is drawing near, to him this brings a certain fear.
He has worked hard his whole life, been married years and is faithful to his wife.
He has a savings, a house a car. His life is stable, yet he is unhappy. He wants more than the status quo.
He wants exciting vacations and fancy presents to give his family, his wife.
In private he despairs over what ifs and what could have been.
He wishes he had more even though he has more than enough.
After Thanksgiving, he knows his wife and family will want money to do the holiday shopping.
He stresses over the fact they will have to cut back just a little this year due to high college tuitions and other important things.
He watches the rich and famous on TV and feels less of a man because like them he will never be.

Another Husband's perspective:

Thanksgiving is drawing near, for most husbands, the worst is telling the family there is a limit.
That this year their house cannot afford to host.
Instead he sits and wonders how to tell them he lost his job.
He's worked hard all his life, but always just made it, no savings to fall back upon.
He always wanted to save for his children's college so they wouldn't have to live paycheck to paycheck like him.
There was always one emergency or another though, and that savings never did begin.
Now he's approaching forty five, and starting over again, wondering where on earth to start.
This Thanksgiving is so hard for him, to celebrate he just doesn't have the heart.

One Wife's Perspective:

These days she is something that is rare. A stay at home mom, a homemaker, she's always been there.
She always delighted in making things just so, Thanksgiving was always the start of her favorite time of year.
With a chill in the air and warmth in her heart she listened in the past to footsteps throughout the house.
Kids running to and fro high strung from holiday treats, yelling for them to calm down trying to hide the smile so they would take her serious.
Now the kids are grown and gone, the holidays shared with in laws and friends.
Just her and hubby now, so why so sad she wonders? Why that empty void?
Her husband is a good man. Always the provider and ever faithful.
She spent her whole life dedicated to her kids, her husband taking the backseat. He worked so hard to give them what they needed to allow her to stay home and be with the kids, she took a backseat to his career.
Now their first Thanksgiving alone, and they don't know what to do or even how to act.
She finally figured out this year that they have become strangers living in the same house.

Another Wife's perspective:

She worked hard her whole life, being mother, career woman and wife.
Thanksgiving she always stressed, so much more for her to do, thinking of what it was really about and giving thanks, she'd rather just hide under the covers for the next month or two.
Superwoman she always felt she had to be, do it all and still have some time free.
This year her husband from her separated.
Why did he leave her? She always made sure everything was perfect! This Thanksgiving she has to go it alone, the kids will visit him in his new home.

Learn your lessons from those above. Thanksgiving and the following holidays are what we make it to be. If we concentrate merely on material things, there will be nothing but an empty void when things go wrong. The grass is always greener on the other side. No matter how bad you think you have it, there's always someone going through it worse. I know, old cliches but oh so true. No matter what your financial situation, your family can be and remain close. However, if you merely judge your own family by its net worth, it won't be worth very much no matter what your bank statement says.