Thanksgiving Tips for Vegetarians and Their Families

"Can't you just pick the bacon out of those green beans and eat it that way?" My well-intentioned aunt asked me this question at the reception to my grandmother's funeral, four years after I became a vegetarian. After four Thanksgivings and four Christmases together, my family still doesn't quite grasp the concept of what it means to be a vegetarian. This probably sums up the Thanksgiving experience for vegetarians who try to participate in the holiday.

Keeping the Peace:
Vegetarians within a family of meat-eaters are often faced with insensitive commentary; sometimes the questions come from people who mean well but aren't educated enough on the subject to know better, much like my aunt. Other times, we are subjected to jabs and jeers from family members who reject our decision to follow "hippie" or "wimpy" diets.

Holidays centered around the consumption of meat- whether it's turkey, ham, duck, or any other animal- seem to highlight the worst in family dynamics. You're left with few options- usually entailing making dish after dish of veg-friendly food yourself and bringing it to your Thanksgiving gathering, or just opting out of the holiday altogether. For most people, neither of these options seems adequate. If making your tofu turkey and eating it, too is stressful at family gatherings try some of these peace-keeping options that will help you better enjoy the holiday.

-Invite all the family to your house this year. That way, if you have to do all the cooking, at least you won't have to lug it across the state. When they see that your Thanksgiving is just like any other (except healthier and more animal friendly) they might relax next year.
-Agree on a menu months in advance and mail out recipe cards to give family members cooking assignments. This way, you'll know how many of the dishes are vegetarian. As an added bonus, your family members might have to try (and maybe actually like!) making something with alternative ingredients.
-Start a new Thanksgiving tradition. If you aren't comfortable watching your family load their plates with turkey meat and gravy-coated potatoes, skip the meal. Instead, invite your family to accompany you to volunteer at a soup kitchen or an animal shelter before or after the meal. It will add a deeper meaning to Thanksgiving for everyone and you can visit with family members without participating in Turkey Holocaust 2006.

What Vegetarians Really Want From Our Families At Thanksgiving:
We want to celebrate a holiday surrounded by our family and friends, the people we are truly thankful to have in our lives. After all, isn't that what this holiday is truly about? We want everyone to remember that Thanksgiving is supposed to be about appreciating all we have in life- our health, our relationships and our ability to contribute positively to our communities- not about what kind of food is on our plates.

We'd appreciate our family members accepting that we are independent, educated, compassionate people competent enough to make our own lifestyle decisions, regardless of the multiple reasons they can list for disagreeing with us. No sneers, put-downs, or grumblings about our what we eat are welcome.

It would be really thoughtful and considerate of anyone who prepares food for the occasion if our diets were taken into consideration when preparing just some of the side dishes.

We spend just as much time as everyone else does making our vegetarian fare and it would make us feel really great if our families would concede to just try some of the food we bring to the table. It doesn't all taste like cardboard, we promise!