That's One Weird Wedding: Prince Albert of Monaco to Wed Bride Charlene Amid Rumours of Third Love Child

What on earth should we make of the wedding of Prince Albert of Monaco, son of the much-loved Prince Rainier and gorgeous Grace Kelly, to South African swimmer Charlene Wittstock, daughter of a photocopier salesman?

It's a very strange match and even stranger because Albert, 53, has long been a confirmed bachelor (babehound) given to creating children out of wedlock and moving on to his next fling.

There are many odd elements to the Monaco royal wedding and marriage.

First, Albert is presumably under pressure to create a heir. That is, he must father a child. The fact that he's already fathered two children (by two different girlfriends) - 19-year-old Jazmin and wildly cute 9-year-old Alexandre - doesn't count. In the weird world that is European monarchy, a sovereign's heir must be born within marriage, not 'out of wedlock'. In other words, a European royal male gets to dismiss heirs that are a result of sexual flings, and succession to the throne - along with riches beyond your wildest dreams- is reserved for his 'legitimate' heir.

So, OK, given the constitution of tiny tax-haven Monaco, Albert needs to produce a legitimate heir. But why's he marrying Charlene? She's not royalty, she's not from Monaco - or France, or anywhere in Europe. Her life and background have zero in common with Albert's. The obvious explanation would seem to be that he fell in love with her while she was competing in a swimming tournament in the Monaco principality some years back. But if that's the case - if it's a love match - how come the pair of them look miserable almost every time they're photographed in public together? And how come Charlene is reported to have headed to the airport days before the wedding, with a one-way ticket to South Africa?

It's all too bizarre. The explanation for Charlene trying to take flight to South Africa and evademarriage is that she found out, days before the wedding, that Albert has a third love child waiting in the wings - one created during their courtship.

But if that's the case - if Albert had been having an affair during his engagement to Charlene - why the heck was he bothering to get married to her? After all, if you're a royal, going to marry just to produce a legitimate heir, would you choose a girl from another continent and another culture? Surely you'd keep the wedding "within the family" and marry one of the many young, minor royals hanging about in Europe. Marrying such a girl would mean he could carry on philandering with the agreement of a young princess who understood and accepted that the deal was dynastic and financial.

Perhaps Charlene has been hoodwinked into thinking she's a real bride entering a genuine marriage. Nineteen-year-old Princess Diana was hoodwinked by Prince Charles and his courtiers in exactly that way. On the other hand, perhaps Charlene knows full well that Albert's looking for an official bride, to play the part of princess, and accepts the deal. The guy has a billion dollars after all! That makes for an awful lot of fun and financial security. Except that....if she accepted the marriage as a business deal, why would she have tried to run away when information about the third love child emerged?

It's all too strange.

What is not in doubt is that the photos of the royal couple in the days before the royal wedding showed both Prince Albert and soon-to-be Princess Charlene (a princessly name which will take some getting used to in Europe...) looking decidedly miserable and stressed. Wondering about in Monaco and appearing at a wedding celebration concert by the Eagles, both Albert and Charlene looked glum and ill at ease.

So, as I said at the outset - what on earth should we make of the marriage of Prince Albert of Monaco, son of the much-loved Prince Rainier and gorgeous Grace Kelly, to South African swimmer Charlene Wittstock....?

Time will certainly tell.

Postscript. Odd, too, that the Prince chose the Eagles to celebrate his wedding. Maybe the Eagles sangthose lyrics from Hotel California and Lyin' Eyes. Remember?...

You can't hide your lyin' eyes. And your smile is a thin disguise.

A rich old man and she won't have to worry.

You can check-out any time you like, But you can never leave...