The ADHD Child

As a parent of a child with ADHD, I know a little bit about the difficulties that not only the child may face, but the family as a unit. Not only can some ADHD children have educational and behavioral issues, but society itself poses a problem at times. There is the belief by some that ADHD is not real, that the children diagnosed are "lazy" or "bad" and it is just an excuse to relieve parents of their duties. Sadly, I've heard this all before. The truth is, the ADHD child may have to face several obstacles and it can kill their self esteem. I have personally tried a few things that may be of benefit to those of you dealing with these same issues. However, I am not a psychologist or psychiatrist and this is not a substitute for medical care. These are simply some tips that I have used to help my child succeed.

One of the first things a parent should do if they believe that there child may have ADHD is to first discuss it with their pediatrician. A learning disability, neurological problem, or other health issue may be mimicking itself as ADHD. Typically, a child psychiatrist or psychologist will confirm a diagnosis of ADHD. If and when the diagnosis is confirmed, be up front with your child's doctor about any issues you may have about his or her treatment. Don't be discouraged if it seems as though nothing is working, it can take time to get it right.

Schools tend to get a bad reputation for how they deal with these children, which is not necessarily founded. Do not assume that dealing with the teachers and figures of your child's school is going to be a nightmare. I was pleasantly surprised when I went in to discuss my child's unique issues with school officials. Not only were they very understanding, but they have been very helpful. The school can help with various aspects of ADHD. For example, my son has a tendency to forget everything. Working with the teacher, we developed a merit system for when he remembers his school work, backpack, coat, and other items. After awhile, he needed fewer reminders and has become more responsible and independent. A great idea, even for children that do not suffer from ADHD is that they have a daily planner that they take to and from school. It also serves as a great communication tool between parents and teachers.

The ADHD child may have problems completing tasks as well. There are several approaches that can help your child finish with homework, complete chores, or whatever needs to be done with little or no fuss at all. Is there a particular time of the day when your child is more focused and alert? Try to schedule things during these times and do not force completion. Set small goals and let your child do things in increments. Breaking up a large task into a smaller one is beneficial because it leads to less frustration. I personally swear by an egg timer. Use this to help your child realize when it's time to start or finish up with particular activities.

Behavioral problems can be a result of many things. Over stimulation, seems to be common of the ADHD children that I've been around. Although all children are different, too much stimulation may be a problem directly because of the inability to pay attention. If your child has problems paying attention in simple everyday situations, imagine what it would feel like to be bombarded with numerous things at once. It may sound difficult, but creating and sticking to a schedule cuts back on outbursts and disruptions caused from too much chaos. The child then knows what is expected and when it is expected. Although this won't take care of all behavioral issues, it can improve conflict regarding bedtime, bath time, and several other items that you frequently dispute with your child.

The one thing that I can not stress enough is encouragement and positive feedback. Children with ADHD may feel inadequate and become discouraged at their efforts. Self esteem contributes to how one performs, if the child feels competent and able, they are more likely to act in that manner. Even when faced with setbacks, the ADHD child needs to be praised for their efforts with genuine enthusiasm. Be your child's personal cheerleader. Try to set aside a few minutes each day to talk about the day and plan fun things to do with your child. If you feel your situation is desperate, discuss this with the health care provider. There are many support groups and services that may be available. You can't cure your child's ADHD, but you can help manage it.