The Alphabet of Road-Tripping

B is for bathrooms that make you cheer,

C is for cows that let out methane gas,

D is for drivers who won't let you pass,

E is for every file on your Zunes,

F is for freedom to change up your tunes,

G is for gas stations that allow you to rest,

H is for 'Hey! We should be going West!',

I is for iPods that keep you from going isane,

J is for jerks who are always a pain,

K is for keeping sleepiness to a yawn,

L is for leisure which is why you have gone,

M is for Mustangs who merge without telling,

N is for naughty bookstores, you know what they're selling,

O is for oil which you should have changed before you left,

P is for practicing defensive driving, so deft,

Q is for quilt which you should have brought with,

R is for reciting every known urban myth,

S is for sitting, you'll be doing that a lot,

T is for traction which is harder to get than you thought,

U is for underwear that creep up your bum,

V is for vehicles who's seats make you numb,

W is for waiting, in traffic, dear Gods!

X is for 'x-treme' crash up ahead, what are the odds?

Y is for yelling at cars that can't hear you,

Z is for the roads that feel like a zoo.