The Amazing Race All-Stars on CBS is Really "The Race for 15 More Minutes"

The CBS powerhouse "The Amazing Race" is back, yet again--and it had better not be as bad as "The Amazing Race: Let's Throw A Bunch of Families Together And Stay In The U.S.," which had me glued to my chair, only because I was too lazy to find the remote and drooling potato chips off my lower lip.

If I had found the bloody remote, I would have thrown it right through the glass, because this show is beginning to teeter on the boring side. The only way that will change is if they brought back Jonathan and Victoria--which they didn't to my dismay so more on that later. Now if that "team" had a tug-of-war on Mount Everest against Rob and Amber, now that would be great, with the winner remaining in the competition and the loser--well, let's just say it would be over and leave it at that.

Back to what really matters--and that's the TV show. CBS obviously did their best to pick out a large cross-section of star "teams" from seasons past. But it reads like a who's who of those who appeared on The Early Show and/or Jimmy Kimmel Live.

In other words, there weren't too many of these "teams" winning the competition--though they did win the hearts of America. Now that everyone has let out a collective ahh across this great land of ours, let me remind you that part of the beauty of "The Amazing Race" is to observe an amazing amount of backstabbing/loyalty mixed in with some genuine moments that only a TV camera can capture--or a producer gonzo about that right "moment."

But the producers did a great disservice to the show by not nabbing Jonathan and Victoria, the duo who put the ooze in the word "poor losers" and left us wanting more when they went ballistic, as usual, and packed it in a long, long time ago.

Having Jonathan and Victoria on the show would have been like nabbing Howard K. Stern and Anna Nicole to talk to kids about the dangers of drugs; the whole thing would have been toxic, it would have made you completely nauseous, but you--and they--would have searched every nook and cranny for more.

Instead you'll get the Kentucky coal miners, back from their cornpone glory--and some hometown celebrity (and now already out of this race, not surprisingly); the afore-mentioned Charla and Mirna, who graced every talk show for what seemed like forever and currently sitting in last place; and Rob and Amber, conniving reality TV vets who can basically just find a way to fall off a cliff somewhere far away but are probably the favorites to win it, along with Colin and Christie, nauseatingly beautiful ath-o-letes.

In the meantime, some former and now spurned "reality stars" are sounding off on their Myspace video blogs, including Chip and Kim, that they were not approached by CBS producers. Big friggin' deal!

In the end somebody will win and lose and return to their throne, either on the Jimmy Kimmel Live show or any other brightly lit couch. And once again, they will get those 15 minutes they so desperately desire.

Try and catch all of the action Sundays on "The Amazing Race: All-Stars" on CBS.