The Anti-Bride Lives Happily Ever After

I tell them I was sick of trying to explain why I was going to be 38 and single.

Of course, that's not true, although the insurance perks sure are nice, I decided to get married because I found the man of my dreams, my soul mate, my better half, you know, the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. However you say it, that is what made me want to get married.

And then they would get to the heart of the matter. They'd probably already asked if we'd set the date so it was time for the following: Did you pick out your dress? What are your colors? Who's in your party? What's your cake like? Do you have a song?

Sometimes I think the real answer to the original question was supposed to be something like, "I wanted to get married so I could spend months being completely absorbed in wedding planning, spending all kinds of crazy money that neither one of us have, creating the biggest and best wedding of the decade, no century, no...universe. And forgetting the reason I was doing this altogether."

I was the anti-bride. I didn't buy every bridal magazine, I only attended one bridal show, and both my mother and I pretty much ran out of it screaming. Seriously, have you been to one of those? Anyhow, I didn't spend months looking for the perfect shoes, I didn't care if the food was amazing or just good, and I didn't talk incessantly about any of it. Okay, I was a little upset when I saw the alternative DJ had Celebrate in his set list, but, well, there is no but. There were very few people I could talk to without them bringing up the wedding. I don't know who was more frustrated: me about people forgetting that I had the ability to talk about something else or them not understanding why I wasn't more excited about the best day of my life. A couple people even questioned whether or not I really loved my fiancé. No one got it.