The Art of Homemaking - Why Grandma Knew Best

Lately, visitors walking into my home feel the need to glance over their shoulder to make sure that they haven't somehow walked through a wormhole to the past. They furtively check the address to make sure that they're in the right place. Why? Well, it could be something to do with the clothes hanging on the line, the apron I'm wearing, the feather duster in my hand and the smile on my face. I have gone retro!

Our Grandmothers knew something that Modern women have somehow lost: There is joy and happiness in taking care of our families. When your children invite kids from the neighborhood over to dinner because, "my mom makes the best pot roast", it makes you feel like a Superhero! When your husband lays his head on a freshly ironed pillowcase and sighs, you feel like a Goddess. When your child's friend asks, "Why does your mom make homemade bread every week?" and your child answers, "Because she loves me", you will know that you've done a good job.

Modern women often complain about that being a wife and a mother is a thankless job. I imagine that's because, as Modern women we've taken the joy out of the job. Think about our average days: Up at 6AM barking at the kids to get up, hurry up and get out of the house to make it to school on time, running to get Suzy her homework, Jack his trumpet, feeding the dogs, curling our hair and putting our blush on. By the time we get to work we've run 3 miles already. Once at work, we continue working at the same pace, wheeling and dealing and making things happen, We leave work at 5PM (if we're lucky), pick the kids up from daycare, run home to get whatever is needed for the evening extra-curricular; football, basketball, instrumental lessons, cheerleading - whatever your kids are into. We make the rounds, dropping our kids off - only to turn around and come back to pick them up, all the while yelling at them to hurry up, not to take the time to talk to friends - we have things to do tonight. Then, it's a quick trip through the drive through and home to begin homework and baths, inevitably something is spilled in the car and we find ourselves yelling. Somewhere around 11:30 with the kids tucked into bed, we manage to put in a load of laundry, lay out clothes for the next day and check our emails. At midnight, we throw the clothes in the dryer, brush our teeth and stumble to bed - only to get up in 6 hours and do it all over again. The Modern woman is over-stressed, over-worked, underpaid, sleep deprived, frustrated and angry. We complain that being a wife and a mother is a thankless job - yet, what do we want to be thanked for? Yelling and screaming, crying and sighing? McDonald's again? Let's compare that to the image of our Grandmothers...

Our Grandmothers, like us awakened at the crack of dawn. They had a day of the week for everything. Monday was Wash Day, Tuesday was Ironing, Wednesday was Sewing, Thursday was Market Day, Friday was Cleaning Day, Saturday was Baking Day and Sunday was their Day of Rest. So, on Monday morning she awakened and had her first load of laundry flapping in the breeze by 7AM. She made a hot breakfast for her children, washed and dried their hands and faces and sent them off to school. She washed the dishes, dried them and put them away. Throughout the day, she washed a load of laundry, hung it out to dry, folded the laundry and put it away. In between those times, she answered correspondence, swept her floors, planned meals and tidied her house. At noontime, she cooked a hot meal for her husband, washed the dishes, dried them and put them away. When her children arrived home from school, she had a snack prepared for them, her daily chore was done and she was prepared to help them with their homework. Dinner was already cooking and when her husband came home, they were ready to eat. After dinner, the family played a game or read together, and then the children were bathed and dressed for bed. Our Grandmothers went to bed with a feeling of accomplishment and contentment. She had the gratitude and love of her family and they had hers.

Financially, many Modern women can't afford to stay home and many of us can't imagine staying home all day. We enroll our children in extra-curricular activities in an effort to raise well rounded children. In school, our children are being pushed to do more at a younger age. By third grade, they are already learning pre-algebra concepts. We are pushing ourselves to work at a faster pace, to do more in a less time and in the process we've lost the joy in living. In an effort to know just a little of the joy that our Grandmothers felt, I've decided to make an effort to do more for my family and to do it with a spirit of joy.

I still work, though my husband and I made the choice to cut my work hours back to 3 days a week. We made the choice to home school our son, so that we could present information to him in a timeframe that he could grasp. We're very lucky that my husband has a job that allows him to work from home. We bought a clothesline. I began making my own laundry soap, baking bread from scratch, planning meals on a weekly basis, doing a little housework each day and making sure that when I do something with my son - I do it with a smile on my face. Each night I clean our bathrooms telling myself that "nothing says I love you like a clean toilet". I spritz our sheets with fabric freshener every morning so that when my family lays their head down each night, their pillows are fresh and sweet-smelling. My son asked me what that smell was and I told him, it's the smell of love. I wear an apron around the house when I'm cleaning - because when I tie the strings around my waist it reminds me of the hugs that I get from my family and by giving them a clean home, I am hugging them all. I hang our clothes out on the line because there really is no smell quite like line dried clothes. My son is still enrolled in extra-curricular activities, but I can relax while watching him practice football because I know that dinner is in the crock-pot waiting for our arrival. I am able to devote my attention to him and tell him how proud I am of him. When we get home, we eat and then look at his school work for the next day. I spend precious time with my husband talking to him about our hopes, our dream and our goals. And when we lay our heads down at night, it is with the knowledge that I have loved my family this day, completely, thoroughly and joyously.