The Bachelor: Officer and a Gentleman: Do the Producers Really Want the Bachelor to Find the Right Woman?

Almost everyone is rather fascinated with the idea of actually watching two people meet and fall in love. Real love is a rare and beautiful thing, and ABC's "The Bachelor" allows us to watch such an intimate human adventure from the comfort of our own couches. However, "reality" TV is not really reality, and the goal of finding the best woman for the bachelor seems to get lost in the hoopla. We don't see everything, and the editors spin "reality" so that our opinions and conclusions are more or less being swayed and influenced. In spite of this, and even in spite of knowing this, many of us watch the show anyway, allowing ourselves to get caught up in "What if he really does find the love of his life?" or "What if this was meant to be?" We are all rooting for the bachelor to find the woman of his dreams. However, that goal often seems to be ignored as the show unfolds.

It seems to me that in the process of making "good TV," the main mission of the show is forgotten: to help the bachelor find a woman that is the best for him. If this were indeed the case, the poor man would be given more time to get to know the original 25 women selected for him to meet. Although 25 seems like a lot of women for one man, just think of it this way. It is a pretty narrow slice of the world's population of women. So what are the chances that a man's soul mate will be in that select group? OK, it's beginning to look pretty dismal already.

However, if one lives by the theory that anything is possible, then there just might actually be a nearly perfect fit in this small selection since the women have been screened carefully and all are supposedly looking for a real relationship. And like the bachelor, they are brave enough to go on national television to find love. BUT...don't you agree that even if a man's dream woman was one of the 25, but she had only a total of 10 minutes to impress him, well, that might cause a problem?? Even the most wonderful of people might not be able to make the right impression in ten minutes, which is the amount of time that some of these women seem to have on the first night.

C'mon! Let the man have at least three nights to mingle and meet the women. Just show some clips from those nights, for Pete's sake, and give the man time to form an opinion. Having to cut out ten women from the first night of meeting them is absurd. How would one even be sure of their names, much less of their personalities, in just a few minutes of time?

Another way the goal of this show seems thwarted is with the farcical "group" dates. That is definitely NOT reality. Why can't the bachelor have little mini dates with each woman? The producers could show selected moments from each date. Would this cost too much? Would it fail to arouse the catfights and drama that supposedly makes "good TV?" Wouldn't this actually come much closer to helping the man choose the right women for his longer, one-on-one dates? Also, some seasons of the bachelor have allowed other people to select the women for the dates. Why? That again is NOT reality nor is it very wise.

A final way that "The Bachelor" could improve the chances for the man of the season to find his true love would be to allow him to view the footage of the women that the audience sees. Why isn't he allowed to see it if it would help him select the most compatible woman for himself and get a glimpse of her true nature? And while I am asking these thought- provoking questions, why aren't there an equal number of seasons of "The Bachelorette" as for "The Bachelor?" After all, the most successful love story that emerged from the show was when Trista was the bachelorette and she found Ryan, who is now her husband. C'mon, producers, at least allow Bevin (from the spring 2007 season) have a shot at finding herself a good man since she didn't get Andy!

In spite of these unanswered questions annoying me season after season, I continue to watch "The Bachelor," and, yes, I root for the woman I feel is the most suitable, and I even cry at the final scene every time, reality or pseudo-reality, as it may be. Sniff. I am so glad Andy chose Tessa. Doesn't she seem like the real deal? And what about Andy himself? Is he too good to be true or what? Sigh. I hope their wedding is televised. Pass me some Kleenex while I eagerly await for the next season of the show to start.