'The Bachelorette' Season 7 Premieres with Drunks, Masks, Solar Power

COMMENTARY | On the premiere of ABC's "The Bachelorette" Monday, Philadelphia dental student (and Brad Womack reject) Ashley Hebert was back and ready for love. But were all of her bachelors?

While a darker-haired Ashley tells host Chris Harrison that she has reflected on the mistakes she made with Womack last season (as in, she was skeptical of his feelings and didn't open her heart up to him) and says she wants no regrets this time, she also reveals some drama for this season before the limos even pull up in front of the mansion.

Yes, Ashley receives an insider's tip on one guy, Bentley, who apparently isn't there for the right reasons (according to his ex-wife, anyway). Ashley's pal happens to be friends with Bentley's ex-wife (small world, eh?) and in his introduction clip he even says he hopes the Bachelorette is Emily Maynard. But Ashley vows to ignore the rumors and give the guy a chance. Uh oh.

The limo lineup starts off with solar energy guy Ryan (let the cheesy lines begin with "The only thing more powerful than the sun is love"), then proceeds to Jon, who lifts Ashley up and says, "Can't we just go straight to the honeymoon?"

But it's Cleveland chef Mickey who makes a play on Chantal O'Brien's infamous greeting to Brad last season. Mickey greets Ashley with, "I have something to give you from all of the men in America," but thankfully he doesn't slap her across the face the way Chantal did to Womack. Instead, Mickey slaps a kiss on Ash's lips -- or attempts to, anyway.

The other bachelors pull out all kinds of props to get Ashley to notice them. San Fran winemaker Ben goes BYOB and brings his own bottle of wine for a quickie toast, Nick is this season's poetry man and Jeff wears a mask so Ash can get to know the "real" him. Does the real him walk around in a mask all the time? And as a bonus, he comes complete with vampire music every time we see him.

But these guys all pale in comparison -- impression wise -- to liquor salesman Tim, who shows up drunk and slurring his words to meet his future wife. Nice. Suffice to say his elimination comes before the rose ceremony even begins, when Ashley finds him passed out (and snoring loudly). Down to 24!

First Impression Rose

Solar energy exec Ryan gets the first impression rose after impressing Ashley with his solar energy spiel (translation: commercial).

Rose Ceremony:

In addition to Tim, who was eliminated before the ceremony started, Frank, Jon, Anthony, Mike, Rob, and Chris also go home empty handed, without a rose -- or Ashley.

As for the infamous Bentley, his good looks and charm get him through the first round. Too bad the trailer for this season shows him still talking about how he wishes the Bachelorette were Emily!

"The Bachelorette" Season 7 Cast Stats:

Ames, 31, portfolio manager - New York, N.Y.
Anthony, 28, butcher - Wyckoff, N.J. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
Ben C., 28, lawyer - New Orleans, La.
Ben F., 28, winemaker - Sonoma, Calif.
Bentley, 28, businessman - Salt Lake City, Utah
Blake, 27, dentist - Greenville, S.C.
Chris D., 25, sports marketing coordinator - Chicago
Chris M., 27, construction company CEO - Edmonton, Canada -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
Constantine, 30, restaurant owner - Atlanta, Ga.
Frank, 29, college admissions director - Murfreesboro, Tenn. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
Jeff, 35, entrepreneur - St. Louis, Mo.
Jon, 26, e-commerce executive - Vancouver, Wash. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
J.P., 34, construction manager - New York, N.Y.
Lucas, 30, oilfield equipment distributor - Odessa, Texas
Matt, 28, office supply salesman - Bridgewater, Mass.
Michael, 29, technology salesman - San Diego, Calif. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
Mickey, 31, chef - Cleveland, Ohio
Nick, 26, personal trainer - Tampa, Fla.
Rob, 27, technology executive - Monroe, Mich. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
Ryan M., 27, construction estimator - Royal Oak, Mich.
Ryan P., 31, solar energy executive - Corona Del Mar, Calif.
Stephen, 27, hairstylist - Manhattan Beach, Calif.
Tim, 35, liquor distributor - Long Beach, N.Y. -- ELIMINATED WEEK 1
West, 30, lawyer -Chapin, S.C.
William, 30, cellular phone salesman - Galloway, Ohio

*****
Source: "The Bachelorette" Season 7 premiere, May 23, 2011, ABC TV