The Benefits of Parenting Advice from Experienced Parents

When we become parents for the first time, we are really beginning a journey into uncharted waters. As new mothers and fathers we have so many questions and may not feel very confident about our parenting abilities. The first inclination for mothers may be to seek parenting advice from their own mother, their mother-in-law or another family member, the child's pediatrician, parenting books or by searching on the internet.

You mother or mother-in-law has certainly reared children, but it has probably been quite a long time since they had young children under foot. The parenting styles of older relatives may not be consistent with modern ideas and methods. One potential problem that could develop by asking your mother or other family member for advice is that if you don't follow their advice, they might take it personally. That could potentially lead to a rift in your relationship with them.

Pediatricians certainly have a great deal of education and see countless babies and children on a daily basis for everything from well-baby visits to diagnosing illnesses. Their advice may certainly be sound, but they may not have the same perspective a mother or father has. They aren't with your child every day. They don't know the personality of the child or the parents that well. Again, their advice may not suit your parenting style or your feelings about a particular topic.

Books can be a valuable resource for general health and development questions about children. Some very good books have been published about various parent-child issues, scenarios and relationships. They are well worth reading, but you may need to read the entire book to glean the two or three pieces of information applicable to the situation at hand.

The internet is a great "at-your-fingertips" method of researching parenting tips and techniques. However, in an age where absolutely anyone with even limited ability is able to post information on the internet, a mother and father need to be cautious about what advice they follow. Just because someone has an attractive website and seems to write with authority, doesn't necessarily mean they've ever reared a child!

One of the best ways to receive parenting advice is to look around your community. Look for parents who have children who behave as you would like yours to behave. Even look for a mother or father who has children a few years older than yours. They've already been through the stage your family is going through. They have survived whatever phase your child is currently going through.

A great way to network is to check the local paper or a regional website for parents' groups. Many communities have support groups or mommy and me groups that advertise their meeting times and locations. A church or community organization may sponsor parenting groups or offer courses specific to your situation.

Stop by the school bus stop in the morning or afternoon if you have older children. You can meet other parents in a casual setting and work up to developing a friendship. The other parents may know of various groups in the community you could join. The great thing about joining a group is that you can hear feedback from the mother or father who has achieved success or had some problems with particular parenting issues.

The experience of an older, more experienced mother or father is invaluable to a new parent. They have already weathered the storm you are in. They can offer reassurance that "this too will pass" and that you're on the right track.