The Best Friend!

It was the summer before the third grade and I was very bored. How I wanted someone to play with but all my friends were away for the day. My mother, seeing how lonely and bored I was, said "Would you like to go play with Ray's granddaughter?".

"Yes!" I shouted, jumping up, ready to go.

That was the day that I found my best friend. Jennifer and I became quick friends and spent all of our time together. We did everything from swimming to canoeing to just hanging and playing My little Ponies. As we got older our interest changed to music, clothes, and even boys but our friendship remained strong.

Than the day came when she moved. We did not get to see each other much after that but we talked every day and occasional would do a sleep over. It was during this time that Jennifer began to change. She went from being a preppy cheerleader to a skater, and in doing so began to party.

I used to believe she was perfect, until I saw her drinking for the first time. I was very surprised but I could not really say anything to her since I also had gotten into the partying stage, including smoking cigarettes'.

After that we began to grow apart, seeing less of each other and talking even less. I still remember the day her mother called mine to see if Jennifer was with us. She had run away from home and eventually ended up in juvenile home and mental hospital.

I was surprised when she wrote me and it felt as if no time had gone by. At this time, my life had changed. I was in college and the adolescent acts were behind me. It seemed as if Jennifer's life was changing for the better as well.

I do not know what happened to change it all again, but eventually she went to live with her father because of drugs and alcohol. Shortly afterwards I would meet my husband and move away from home.

My marriage to my husband would not last the first time around, and I would come home. My family was a blessing, but Jennifer was the one that gave me a break from reality. We would make a morning of it by going for a walk to get a Sunny Delight before heading to the tanners. I never once doubted leaving my son with her and she never once tried to get me into her world. At night she did her thing and I did mine.

Are friendship would part yet again. My son is my life and I have one main rule which is: "I can't stop him from learning or experimenting with drugs or booze, but he will never see it in the home!'.

I had to make a decision between my best friend and my son, and I chose my son. It is a decision I would make again and again, but even though I walked away from our friendship, Jennifer knew I was always there if she needed a friend.

Over the years she would call or stop in for a visit, yet we still remained distant. I remember after having my second son, walking to town with the boys. On the bench was an older lady and a young female. The female started talking to me, asking me how I was doing and I did not recognize her. It was Jennifer, and she was drunk.

She gave me her number, and told me to call her. I never did - did not want to because this was not the Jennifer I knew. I would not see her again for a year.

When I saw her again, she looked great. She was happy, and clean. She had moved closer to her mother and with her help really straightened up. I remember thinking that this was the Jennifer I knew and was more than happy to introduce her to my husband and sons.

I truly wish I had more time back than to visit with her after that day, even a phone call, because last year she past away. I remember walking into the funeral home and I had to turn around and walk out. Seeing her there was the hardest thing I ever did. My last gift to her was a single white rose.

Two weeks later I would be told I should have a consider having a hysterectomy done to prevent the possible cancerous cells I had from turning into cancer.

Even though it killed me to agree, I did for the sake of my boys. Shortly after that we would move and, I know it sounds weird, but I had one of those dreams within a dream. Atleast that is what I call it because it sounds better than saying you thought you see a ghost.

I had awoken during the night and next to my grandmother's dresser was Jennifer. She was dressed all in white and her blond hair was flowing. She looked beautiful and peaceful. I smiled and closed my eyes, than immediately opened them again.

Not long after that I would discover that I am pregnant. I felt like it was a miracle. I lost my best friend and in return I was being giving a chance to have one more child. Shortly afterwards I found out that the bad cells were gone but my good news was not to stop there. My third child is to be a little girl, after two boys, a daughter was the one thing my heart wanted.

It is a strange feeling, but I sincerely believe Jennifer had a hand in fulfilling my dreams for a daughter. Today would be her 32nd birthday and today I am finally full term, and after being on bed rest for over a month due to preterm labor, I know my best friend is still here when I need her.