The Best Michael Scott Quotes from "The Office" Season 1

The American comedy series, "The Office," which is an adaptation of the British comedy series of the same name and is currently in it's seventh season, revolves around the Scranton, Pennsylvania branch led by regional manager Michael Scott, played by Steve Carell. As the central character of the television series, Scott's antics are a focal point of the popular television program. Beginning with the first season in 2005, Scott shined as the quirky, sometimes offensive, boss, of the Scranton branch of the paper company, Dunder Mifflin. These quotes from Season 1 show Michael Scott's attempts at being the comedian of the office, whether the other characters perceive him to be that or not.

From Episode 1: "Pilot"

Michael: This is our receptionist, Pam. If you think she's cute now, you should have seen her a couple years ago.

Michael Scott: [On the phone.] Yes, I'd like to speak to your office manager, please. Yes, hello. This is Michael Scott. I am the Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin Paper Products. Just wanted to talk to you manager-a-manger. [Quick scene cut.] All right. Done deal. Thank you very much, sir. You're a gentleman and a scholar. Oh, I'm sorry. OK. I'm sorry. My mistake. [hangs up] That was a woman I was talking to, so... She had a very low voice. Probably a smoker, so... [Clears throat] So that's the way it's done.

From Episode 2: "Diversity Day"

Oscar: Okay, Michael, um... Both my parents were born in Mexico.

Michael: Oh, yeah...

Oscar: And, uh, they moved to the United Sates a year before I was born. So I grew up in the United States.

Michael: Wow.

Oscar: My parents were Mexican.

Michael: Wow. That is... That is a great story. That's the American Dream right there, right?

Oscar Martinez: Thank... Yeah...

Michael Scott: Um, let me ask you, is there a term besides Mexican that you prefer? Something less offensive?

Oscar Martinez: Mexican isn't offensive.

Michael Scott: Well, it has certain connotations.

Oscar Martinez: Like what?

Michael Scott: Like... I don't... I don't know.

Oscar Martinez: What connotations, Michael? You meant something.

Michael Scott: No. Now, remember that honesty...

Oscar Martinez: I'm just curious.

Michael Scott: ...empathy, respect... [Phone ringing.] Jim! Jim!

Jim: Hello? Hello?

Michael Scott: ...Man I should have gotten some food.

Kevin Malone: [Itialian accent]Maybe some spagh-etti.

Michael Scott: Okay, Kevin. You can take that off that thing, OK? That would really, really have shown him up, wouldn't it? If I'd brought in some burritos or some colored greens or some pad Thai. I love pad Thai.

Stanley Hudson: It's collard greens.

Michael Scott: What?

Stanley Hudson: It's collard greens.

Michael Scott: That doesn't really make sense. Because you don't call them collared people, that's offensive. Hmm... Okay, well, it's after five. So... Thank you very much. Buena vista Oscar. Thank you. Good job. Oh, my man. Thank you Brazil. Nice.

Episode 4: "The Alliance"

Michael Scott: When I retire, I don't want to just move to some island somewhere. I want to be the guy who gives it all back. I want it to be like, 'Hey... who donated that hospital wing that's saving so many lives?' 'I don't know. It was anonymous.' 'Well, guess what. It was Michael Scott.' 'But how do you know? It was anonymous.' [Pause.] 'Because I'm him.'

Episode 5: "Basketball"

Oscar Martinez: [of Mexican descent] I can play, if you need any help.

Michael Scott: I will use your talents come baseball season, my friend. Or if we ever decide to box.

Michael Scott's entertaining yet peculiar personality makes him a part of some of the most entertaining situations on "The Office" from season 1, all the way through season 7. So, be sure to check out the other, awesome episodes of this hit sitcom, as well.