The Blond Invasion

I have been noticing a disturbing trend. Well . . . I'm hoping it's a trend. If it isn't then the world as we know it is doomed.

Is it my imagination or is everyone going blond?

Every commercial, print ad, woman AND man (working within a 500 mile radius of the Dallas area) has dyed their hair blond. Wheat, straw, honey, strawberry, highlights, backlights, up-dos . . . Ughhhhhh. Every permeation of this color is saturating the streets. What is going on? Did the kids from Village of the Damned actually survive the fire?

I know trends come and go, but this is down right disturbing. It is so incredibly noticeable, I've started calling friends in other states and countries and am taking a poll. I've asked friends in Arizona, Indiana, Nevada and Japan to take notice. How many blonds do you see in the course of an eight hour day? None of them had given it much thought until I flipped the switch. It hasn't occurred to anyone that we are being invaded. I didn't dare ask friends from California or Miami since the trend seems to have started in those regions.

I'm sure most of these people are human. But . . . then there are those who I'm certain are from a land we humans dare not go.

If you've ever seen the movie "They Live", it will really put in perspective why this blond thing should concern us as a planet. People flooding beauty salons for instant EVERYTHING - - hair, nails, boobs, butts and thighs. Then, they automatically get their hair lighted to the lightest shade possible. Trend, or trickery?

Most women are expected to change their hair (color, length, texture . . .). But, now that men are masking themselves behind a title of Metrosexual, it makes it easier for the alien beings to morph into our society as an inconspicuous by-stander. The most disturbing part. I too almost fell victim to the spell. I bought a bottle of hair dye and in a moment of temporary insanity attempted to highlight my raven black hair.

I know for certain that I was in a total state of hypnosis when I attempted this. I NEVER put chemicals in my hair. I have never had a desire to dye my hair. So I know this was a force of evil trying to infiltrate my mind with wicked streaks and tones.

The complete tragedy of it all. Only one side of my head took the dye and the rest frizzed up like the butt end of an un-groomed poodle. ALIENS! ALIENS I TELL YOU!!! WE MUST STOP THEM!.

Okay, maybe I'm seemingly a bit passionate about this issue. Let me step back a moment and reassess. It could be some ploy by Hollywood for an upcoming movie. It could be that someone announced on some trendy news show that blond is "in". Heck, it could be a virus. You know what? I really don't care about the how. But I'm really stuck on the why. Why are there so many of them?

Be cautious people. They are all around us. Eating, shopping, working and talking with us. Are they here for our brains? Our money? Our planet?

Be afraid. But, should you choose to cave in and go to their side. Have a professional do it for you the first time. Even when poodles are groomed they look weird.