The Britney Smear Boycott

Enough is enough! Just as Dr. Phil McGraw has claimed to step up to the plate to be proactive in an onslaught of tragic events in the life of a young pop star, so shall I be. Okay, even if Dr. Phil is not the greatest example of a noble gentleman, it's time I look to myself to take more control over what I will digest from the media. Not only am I calling upon myself to take a higher, more evolved road to stiff-arm barrage of mental junk food through the media vending machines, but I'm calling upon every last American citizen (and illegal alien) to do the same and ban any sugary decaying newsy gossip about Britney Spears from our eyes, ears and minds for the next eight months.

That's right, even that poem I wrote a couple of weeks ago titled "Perhaps it is Far More Easier Than We Thought to Slip Down the Long Dewy Grassy Hill that Leads to the Valley of Public Self Destruction When All Lenses Turn You on Then Turn on You." Don't read it. Don't email it. Don't even spend a nanowatt of brain energy on it.

All those mesmerizing yet silly gossip rags you see at the checkout lines of the grocery stores, drug stores and newsstands, if they squeeze in any feature on the cover concerning Ms. Spears, don't buy them. In fact, don't even pick them up to flip through. Show those unimaginative reporters and publications that you'll be lending no support to the Britney Smear Nonsense - thank you very much.

If the news program you're watching is featuring a story on Ms. Spears, turn the channel. You can turn it back if you want once the story is over, or you can just ban them from being viewed for the day (by you). Come on, I believe in you! You can do it. Our media obsession with Brit, surely in no way, is helping her, and it's definitely not helping you.

Don't get indignant on me now. I know you can do what you want...read what you want, and digest celebrity trash if you want to. I'm quite aware that this is your prerogative. But just for a second, let's just imagine that we united as one American community (I'm not getting all patriotic here, just making a point). Think about the power we would have over the internet, radio, print, and television in the next eight months if we started dictating what we will and will not stand for. It's almost like looking your boss in the face after he/she told you that you only have a 30 minute lunch break, and you turn to them and say, "I'm taking 45." And then you walk out the door without another word. How great is that?

This is what I'm proposing. From right this second, until the beginning of September, we reject any private information about Brit, her boys, her court woes and her ex-hubby K-Fed (or Fed-Ex). This is nothing personal against Brit. On the contrary, the only way she's going to find solace is if she crawls into some cave somewhere and seeks out her own peace, because what's more disturbing than watching her unravel, is our intense fixation on watching her unravel. We're beyond this aren't we? It's time we enforce the Britney SMEAR Boycott - because there's much more going on in the world and this is not the kind of falling star we wish upon.