The Brutally Honest Guide to Eastern Washington University Campus Life

Introduction
So, you just opened the mail and found out you were accepted to Eastern Washington University; congratulations! Pretty soon, you'll be paroled from high school or will be done with the high school-like drama of a community college. Actually, come to think of it, the University isn't that much different than high school; after all, you've still got cliques and division (to see living proof, eat lunch at Baldy's in the upstairs level of the Pub on any given school-year afternoon and you'll see what I mean) and the only real difference is that you live on campus and alcohol is less frowned upon.

Anyways, as an EWU newbie, you've probably got a lot more on your plate before the big day rolls around and you hit the road for the best four (or two if you transferred from a community college) or two years of your life; picking your classes, prerequisite requirements, declaring a major, making sure you don't get a complete loser for a room mate and how to pay for it all, amongst other things.

But besides all of that, you're probably wondering what your stay at EWU is going to be like. I mean, you want to make the most of it, after all. When I went to EWU, at leat, I was, quite possibly worried about that the most next to, of course, making good marks in my classes. This is why I present to you, from an EWU Alumnist to an EWU newbie; the brutally honest guide to EWU student life.

Now there are three EWU campuses; one in Bellevue (western Washington), one in my hometown of Spokane, which is the second largest city in the state, only behind Seattle. But in this guide, I will be focusing on the main campus in Cheney, Washington, which is 20 miles down the freeway west of Spokane.

In regards to talking of what it's like to live in Cheney, let alone virtually any college town in America, I will always remember my dad's short and sweet description; if you're not there to study or party, there isn't a damn thing to do. Most of that is true about the city. As a matter of fact, if it weren't for a college being there, Cheney would be yet another hick/redneck/ghost town; in other words, the perfect setting for a country music video.

Anyways, there is one main strip of a ��"šï¿½ï¿½"town��"šï¿½ï¿½ area in Cheney, which is the made up of an optimum blend of most of the major fast food chains (several open 24/7), a couple of grocery stores, pizza places, liquor and convenience stores and, of course, at least four bars per city block. This, of course, means that if you want to ��"šï¿½ï¿½"enjoy��"šï¿½ï¿½ college without the good marks to show for, Cheney is an ideal venue to pursue such a goal.

Such student hot spots include the Basement, Goofy's or Wild Bill's.

Bookstore/Stuff to Buy
Now, I am not going to go on a diatribe about the academic experience because, quite frankly, I only got a degree in Communications and Journalism from EWU and only know things about classes in Communications, Journalism and English (the first major I chose before I came to my senses and realized that it was not for me, though I won't go there). Bottom line, your academic experience will vary depending on your devotion and what degree you're going after.

But there is one thing that all students have in common to needs and/or wants during their stay at EWU; books for classes, supplies, computers and maybe some things for entertainment. And thus, this is where the EWU campus bookstore comes in. The biggest draw of the establishment is the fact that you can purchase all of your books and materials for all of your classes here. Just make sure to bring some serious cash, because the books and materials will run you a pretty penny (but that is college). Other places around town such as the Tree of Knowledge (1^st Street) will claim to have lower prices, but they are generally blowing smoke. I mean, their selection is extremely limited, and at the most, you're going to save, if they even have your book, a couple of bucks.

The bookstore also sells some essentials and non-essentials that either will enable you to do your homework without staying up to the butt-crack of dawn in the computer labs and/or listen to the sorority pledge next door's endless play list of Hillary Duff and Ashlee Simpson. Campus Bookstore also is an exclusive supplier of Dell, Gateway and Apple computers, serving whatever operating system persuasion you fancy. The dealer also offers serious student discounts not only on hardware, but software as well. For instance, some people might like to play around with or require Creative Suite for a class. This suite will run you about $1200 otherwise. At EWU, you can get it for $199; and the full version at that.

And back to drowning out the Sorority sister's Ashlee Simpson and and Hillary Duff-athon, campus bookstore also stocks several of Apple's iPod devices, also available at reasonable prices. Meaning, this can enable you to download iTunes, fill up your playlist with a few good hours of Slayer and Morbid Angel and get her to, possibly, turn her schmuck down. And, you'll have a portable device to walk to class with; like the majority of the rest of the student population.

Besides electronics, Campus Bookstore also stocks a few game systems (XBOX, PS2/3, PSP) and the games to play them in. In addition, the store has its own record and movie shop, stocking the best in popular albums, movies and TV shows. While this part of the shop stocks a variety of what the general student population is watching, listening to and playing and is pretty good, it may not be enough to some. I mean, if you're like me, craving a mix of Skinny Puppy, KMFDM, Combichrist, VNV Nation or Bella Morte, your chances of finding such artists in the record shop are slim and none. On the bright side, Bob, the media guy, can special order virtually anything, and its there within the week; most of the time.

Dorks Rejoice!
Like I said, EWU bookstore stocks platform games and the occasional popular PC game. If you're a platform gamer, there is not much of a community for this. However, if you're a PC gamer, digging multi player games such as Call of Duty, Unreal Tournament, Quake, Doom or more recently, World of Warcraft and you can't make friends, there is something seriously wrong with you. The campus boasts two major hot spots for PC gamers, called the cyber cafes. Both of these are located in the pub; one is on the lower level right next to the bottom level smoothie shop. The other one is on the second level, kiddie-cornered from the front entrance to the PUB. Here, the computers feature all of the games I mentioned, except for Warcraft. However, there is a large community of WoWers on the EWU campus. In other words, even when the Cyber cafes close around midnight, hosting an all-night multi-player party is very possible. Who said dorks have no life?

Clubs/Greek/Religious Outlets
For quite a few collective interests of students on campus, there are a growing number of organizations open for new students to join up with. Some of these include the College Republicans, Young Democrats and the EWU Anime Club, all of which meet weekly and have regular activities. One of the more controversial has included College Republicans' Affirmative Action Bake Sale, where they sell baked goods, though only serve minorities. The activity is done to highlight their opposition to the practice which has been in practice for some time now. Most organized clubs on campus, however, focus on issues surrounding a particular ethnic group (African American Students Alliance, Asian American Organization), minority culture (SAFE; the Gay/Straight Alliance) or the most ubiquitous, Christian organizations.

Speaking of the latter, if you're coming to EWU and are looking either to find solace with people of your own faith in the Christian religion, or are, at some point, hoping to find Jesus, you have a lot of venues to do so. EWU boasts several non-sanctioned but very vocal Christian clubs on campus; Campus Crusade for Christ and Chi Alpha, the most noted. Both of these, and others, hold weekly bible studies and activities. There are also several churches sprinkled around campus. If you wish to find when and where one of these hold Bible studies, look for one of the millions of flyers posted around campus. Careful, however; if you are a non-Christian or not what some label as a ��"šï¿½ï¿½"Jesus Freak,��"šï¿½ï¿½ stand advised that some of these groups are known to badger students and make them feel unwelcome because they don't lead their lives like them and solicit them for information on their stance on faith. Some groups also distribute propaganda to students and there is the occasional extremist sign-wielding whack-job doing their ��"šï¿½ï¿½"service to God��"šï¿½ï¿½ in the middle of campus. When this happens, it is not recommended being Gay and walking with your same-sex partner, being Muslim or wearing gym clothes; if you do so, prepare to get an earful.

EWU also boasts an up-start debate team which is growing every year. There are also several fraternities and sororities on campus, open for students to pledge and be a part of some of the most visible demographics on campus. Although this is the case, why would you pay to make friends, when you can make all you want for free. It's called declaring a major.

On-Campus Entertainment/Media
As I mentioned, there is next to squat to do off of campus shy of getting hammered. However, the campus, over the years, has become a hot bed for some quite interesting lecturers, up and coming bands and comedians to come through and do their thing. One of the most popular networks watched on the EWU cable network is, hands down Comedy Central. And this is good, because at least a couple of times a year, comedians made famous on Comedy Central make stops on the campus. In the two years I spent going there, comedians such as Kyle Cease and the Sklar Brothers have made stops there, charging very small fees to students to see them live. Other bands such as No Doubt (before Tragic Kingdom) and even the Ying Yang Twins have made stops on the EWU campus, bringing a little groove to the masses.

Now, when someone says that they are going to a lecture, one might immediately think such an ordeal would be extremely boring. Yes, there are such those, such as some of the ones put on by any of the cultural or feminist organizations, which basically entail a person standing before a crowd for two hours detailing the evils of white, heterosexual men. On the other hand, some guest speakers had made stops on the campus, some of them very cool or even controversial for one reason or another. One year, the campus saw the star of the movie Murderball, Gideon Yago (MTV News), Tanya and Veronica from Road Rules and Real World, Morgan Spurlock (Most famous for the show, 30 Days, but especially the human guinea pig flick Super Size Me), and even, most notably, over the last few years, the Ron Jeremy. Bottom line; even more reason to skip the bars on certain nights, or even stay in your room with friends playing World of Warcraft.

Two other things exist on campus that, quite possibly, don't get the buzz that they really deserve. The Easterner is EWU's award-winning campus newspaper. The publication is out there to keep the student up to date on all campus happenings and even act as a sounding board for those who wish to utilize it as such.

EWU also is host to KEWU 89.5 FM, which has been on the Cheney/Spokane dial for over 50 years. While format has changed several times, this very cool non-profit station now plays straight-ahead jazz from all eras and variations and even blues on Friday nights. If such music strikes your fancy, it runs from 6a-1a weekdays and 9a-1a week ends, or 24/7 on their website.

Sports Teams
All of the major sports and others are played on the EWU campus. All teams are quite good, and have even churned out some players to the NBA and NFL. In 2007, in fact, Rodney Stuckey was EWU's star basketball player. Now, in the next season, Stuckey is to begin a stint playing for the Detroit Pistons.

The games are very fun to go to and our fans loyal. However, don't get discouraged to know that it is our city rival, Gonzaga University, which gets the lion's share of the media coverage, though this is an understatement. But hey, at least its not bad as the exposure given to Whitworth University, a Christian university in Spokane.

Dorms
There are several dorm halls on the EWU campus; that is, if you're not living at home or if you'd much rather get some of the apartments or rent a house either in Cheney or Spokane. Everything you've probably heard about dorm life is probably true; there is the occasional loud mouth who is usually up late blasting crappy music (Reign in Blood, anyone). And yes, there are the occasional dorm room thefts where somebody's XBOX, computers, cell phones or iPods are stolen. However, with locking up and always being careful who you let in, such a thing may not be a problem for you.

Now, then, all of the dorms are quite the same in regards to population and opportunity to enjoy some quiet time, whatever that may be. That is, with the exception of a couple; there is Morrison (next to Streeter), which is the wellness dorm. In this dorm, all residents are required to sign a contract saying that while living there, they will refrain from the use of tobacco, drugs, or alcohol. If there is the best chance for quiet time, it might be here, with the exception of a group getting together for Star Trek and pizza in the lobby on weekends.

Or, if you really crave quiet time, it is recommended that you stay away from Pearce, as this has earned the biggest reputation for being the loudest, party dorm. In fact, most of the underage drinking and MIP citations are handed out in this dorm, so that must say something.

Food
As I said, there is a wide variety of fast food restaurants in Cheney. However, if you don't wish to blow all of your flex dollars or money on your Eagle Card (money is put on this via your meal plan, saving you from needing money out of pocket to buy meals/groceries at the Eagle Shop, which is a great alternative to the shops on 1^st), campus grocery or the cafeteria is your best bet. Several different kinds of food are served at several campus outlets, from burgers and fries, to pizza, Asian and Mexican delights. Also, breakfast isn't half bad. One quick note, though; if you dig coffee and don't go for lattes or mocha, stay away from any of the coffee houses on campus, except for Thomas Hammer on the lower level of the pub or the coffee setup in Baldy's. Anywhere else, you're paying your money for coffee-flavored water, which is not good, especially for morning classes.

Conclusions/Final Notes
So now, hopefully, this guide was extremely helpful for you in learning to navigate around the EWU campus. Follow these steps and go to class on a regular basis, and your experience is bound to be quite good. I will leave you with two final notes. First of all, the campus is not driver-friendly. Therefore, either come to campus very early when driving, or take the bus, which is free via your paid tuition. Oh yeah, and if you're standing outside the pub and it smells like rancid dookie, don't worry. The sewer system is under the structure, so this is routine. This is Andrew Midnight, signing off.