The Butt End of White Elphanant - The Best Ideas for the Worst Gifts

Have you ever had an office Christmas party where a White Elephant Gift Exchange is the highlight of many of your fellow co-workers' life? Where they have waited all year just for this opportunity to dispose of some hideous gift they had received from an in-law or past white elephant gift exchange? I think Dirty Santa would have been a better description of our office gift exchange!

Back many moons ago, when I worked at the local Public Health Office where I lived at the time, this was the traditional office party. Many of the old timers waited the whole year just for this I swear and was the only thing that kept them from retiring! Every year I would get some crappy gift where I was left thinking..."What the hell?"

Let me take you down memory lane of some of the "wonderful" white elephant gifts I received. Note the tone of sarcasm there please when I say "wonderful"!

One year I received a so-called collectors wine bottle filled with dried beans for making soup. Well, the seal was broken... thus no longer making it a collectors item, little lone, the absence of the original contents! Now why would someone do that? It is beyond me!

Yet another year, a lovely dusty old lampshade absent the lamp, just the shade, faded and the plastic liner even dry rotted cracked! Okay, this was funny why? I am still at a loss for a answer, but boy did the other employees' really get a chuckle out of it!

Now mind you, I also brought my little "gift exchange" items. One year it was a perfume set that I wasn't thrilled with the fragrance but knew if one of the older ladies got their fingers on it they would love it! Another year I brought a manicure set, a nice one mind you, with the little battery operated filers, sanders, polishes and all! I already had my own set when I received that one as a gift from another person for some occasion I can't recall. Nevertheless, I saved it for the White Elephant gift exchange knowing that the ladies would appreciate it.

Well, I did the nice gifts for the duration of my employment there, but my last year I decided, enough was enough! It was my turn to play Dirty Santa! You ask, "What was my parting year from Public Health gift?" Well, allow me to tell you! Tampons! Yes! Tampons! Even the multi use box! You know the ones, the ones that come in all sizes for all flows! My thoughts and reasoning on this you ask. Why would someone give that as a gift? Simple, I knew none of the women that remained in my department could personally get any use from them and I would get to enjoy the laugh myself! And that I did! When the winner of my lovely heart felt gift opened it, her face drew south and she said, "Just what the he** am I suppose to do with this?" My response, simple... laughter!