The Case of the Dreaded Immunizations

I know that immunizations in general are a very controversial topic these days, so please don't think that this is an opinion piece. This is for the mommy out there who has decided to stick with the immunization schedule and dreads those visits to the doctor. Mostly because I'm a wimp do I dread these visits! I think that sometimes it's even harder on me as I feel like the world's worst mommy than it is on my baby girl!

I love the well baby visits as it's always fun to see how much she's grown and progressed since her last visit. My husband and I even take bets on our baby's length and weight before the appointment just to make it more interesting. It's a great time for me to ask my many many questions and ensure that our baby is on the right track and that all is well. I feel a huge sense of relief when the well baby visit is over and I have heard that my baby is doing great! Then it comes time for the immunizations and my stomach goes into knots. Mostly because I know that terrible "how could you?!" look that my baby girl is about to give me.

We have fabulous nurse who now knows us (is that good or bad?!) and is so patient and wonderful with not only my baby but me. They tell me that it's not a terrible pain for her, much like the initial prick that we feel when we get shots. I know that there are good reasons for the immunizations and I try to remind myself as I brace for the inevitable response that's coming. One minute my baby girl is having fun crunching up the paper on the examination table, laughing and having a good time.....and then it's time! Slowly the nurse approaches and pricks her with the first needle, if it was for me I would look away but not this mommy with her baby. It takes a minute usually for her to realize what just happen and then it's there--the ear piercing scream and the betrayed look that she gives to her mommy. How could you do this to me? It's one of those cries that are so sad and I feel as if I've just hurt her.

I know logically that she's not hurt and that I'm looking out for her well being, but I feel awful. She just wants to be cuddled and comforted, and I know for certain that some of it is personality. She will even stop crying temporarily to look at me and the nurse as if to say "you two did this to me and I'm mad". She usually cries the entire length of the hospital (where our pediatrician office is) so I look like the world's worst mommy. I have now lost all dignity and am singing out loud through the corridor as I push the stroller, I could care less who sees or hears me and am just focused on ensuring that I do whatever it takes to calm this screaming baby down.

I know that immunizations are not a mean thing to do to your baby and that my intentions are good. If you are a mommy like me however who takes one look at that little baby face and feels great remorse and sympathy, then you understand where I'm coming from. My poor baby gets the typical reaction where she sleeps a lot, wants to cuddle for at least the next 24 hours, and often gets a fever. All normal, but all part of what makes me feel like a mean mommy. This is written to the mommy who fears the dreaded immunization and though she knows she's looking out for her child's well being, she temporarily feels like a mean mommy.

Good luck at your next well baby appointment!