The Complete List of New Christmas Albums (Maybe...)

Christmas music is important. Why? Because Christmas is a time for celebration. And to celebrate properly, one needs music.

Christmas music is relegated to three categories: 1) the crappy elevator kind they pipe into department stores and, of course, elevators; 2) the kind other people like but you can't stand; and 3) the kind you like and other people can't stand.

But you're trying to survive the holidays, so forget pleasing everybody else and go with option 3.

Alright. 'Tis the season and all that garbage. So you just found out there is not enough brandy for your eggnog and the in-laws are visiting so you're stuck listening to boring stories of yesteryear instead of doing what you really want, like watching "How The Grinch Stole Christmas." Then it's off to the liquor store and the nearest music emporium (you could download the albums onto your PC - but then you'd still be out of brandy and you would still be forced to listen for the nth time about that year Uncle Marty got everybody's presents mixed up) to check out all the new Christmas albums available this year. (Tell everybody you'll be right back to get them to not invite themselves along. Then, proceed to drive oh so slowly in your not-so-open sleigh.)

On the way, pop in Trans-Siberian Orchestra's first album, "Christmas Eve and Other Stories." Nobody rocks Christmas like Trans-Siberian Orchestra, except maybe Mannheim Steamroller.

But you've got to get something new - to make it look as if you actually were not trying to avoid the in-laws. For appearances sake - you know the drill. So who has new Christmas albums out this year?

Faith Hill released "Joy To The World" at the end of September and has watched the album peak, fall, and climb back up the charts. It has begun falling again, peaking at No. 13 on the Billboard 200 albums chart. It is a traditional Christmas offering, with a tried-and-true country music slant. But Faith Hill has a world-class voice, so you have to really search for the country.

Enya has a new album out, "And Winter Came," her first since 2006's "Sounds of the Season with Enya." Ten of the twelve songs on the album were written by Enya and her long-time collaborator, Roma Ryan. The album is doing well, having peaked at No. 8, and is full of the same type of music that caused Stan on "South Park" to reconsider killing his 100-year-old grandpa.

If you're in the mood for a crooning Christmas, Harry Connick, Jr. ("What A Night! A Christmas Album") and Tony Bennett ("A Swingin' Christmas") both have Christmas offerings in the stores.

Elvis has an album of Christmas Duets, appropriately titled "Christmas Duets," in the stores. Since you are more partial to Elvis' "Blue Christmas" solo, you might pass, but it is something to think about. Elvis never recorded a duet, so be forewarned. The aforementioned "Blue Christmas" is performed by Elvis and Martina McBride. (Okay...) LeAnn Rimes, Gretchen Wilson, Olivia Newton-John and Carrie Underwood are also on the album, if that helps.

For the more classically inclined, Yo Yo Ma & Friends have recorded some rockin' cello Christmas tunes on "Songs of Joy and Peace."

There are several compilations of various artists: "The Essential Now That's What I Call Christmas," a Starbucks edition called "Winter Wonderland," and the Christmas EP, "Wrapped Up."

Sarah Brightman, the over-the-top classical stylist-turned-pop singer, released "A Winter Symphony" in October for your Christmas-listening enjoyment. The album features much of what Brightman is famous for: choiral arrangements mixed with a little pop music.

Straight No Chaser offers "Holiday Spirits," an album of straight-up traditional Christmas songs - a capella.

George Strait has an album loaded with nothing but traditional Christmas tunes in the traditional country music vein called "Classic Christmas."

Amy Grant has released "A Christmas Collection," which offers up 18 Christmas standards.

Julianne Hough, Fancast's Sexiest Woman of 2008, has an EP out: "NBC's Sounds of the Season: Holiday Collection 2008."

Mannheim Steamroller has two new Christmas albums out, "Christmasville" and "A Candlelight Christmas." You want to check these out thoroughly because the best thing about Mannheim Steamroller is that there are none of those annoying lyrics to interfere with the music.

And that's just the new stuff. There's tons of old stuff, like Bing Crosby. More Elvis. Lots of country favorites, from artists like Toby Keith, Alan Jackson, and Reba McEntire. Then there's reggae. And R&B. You could even go old school and get some Sinatra, Dean Martin, or Brenda Lee. Even Lynyrd Skynyrd has a Christmas album out.

It seems that every artist in the world has a Christmas album. Your choice or choices, of course, depend on your musical tastes and mood at the time of purchase. "The Essential Now That's What I Call Christmas" CD is suggested for the indecisive. It has 25 tracks, including the aforementioned "Blue Christmas" by Elvis (sans McBride), Chuck Berry's "Run Rudolph Run", John and Yoko's "Happy Xmas (War Is Over)," some Dino, Sinatra, and Brenda Lee. There's even songs by Hall and Oates, the Temptations, Burl Ives, Wham!, Elton John, and Amy Grant, not to mention "The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)" and "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer."

But by this point, you're totally sick of the entire idea, so you're searching - in vain - for Slayer Christmas albums. You think very seriously of purchasing Slipknot's "All Hope Is Gone" but settle for the two Mannheim Steamroller albums (it is Christmas, after all) and the new Beyonce "I Am...Sasha Fierce" (just for something to look at).

It is imperative that you do not let Chip Davis and Mannheim Steamroller lull you into forgetting that you still have to make a stop at the liquor store. Remember the in-laws? The music will only soothe the savage beast just so much, you know...

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Sources:

Billboard.com

Amazon.com