The Confident Pregnancy: Step 1: Doing Your Homework

When I first found out I was pregnant, I always felt like my head was detached from my body, and none of it was attached to Planet Earth. The first thought is often one of immediacy. It is, after all, the most important news in the world, so something has to be done! Unfortunately, apart from the initial blood check to confirm the good news, most doctors I've encountered don't want to see you until around twelve weeks.

This particular part of maternity care always made me want to go down to the office and strangle someone. The reason for this policy is simple, so brace yourself, as you will soon be hearing it from friends, family, co-workers, articles, books and complete strangers. According to the March of Dimes website (www.marchofdimes.com), about 15% of all recognized pregnancies end in miscarriage, the majority of which occur prior to twelve weeks gestation (i.e. twelve weeks after sperm meets egg). But before you go into a panic, look at it this way - that means you have an 85% chance of not miscarrying, and those odds are pretty darn good.

So, instead of counting the minutes until the twelve-week mark and your first "official" appointment, why not spend that time acquainting yourself with the flood of information that will apply to your life over the next 40 weeks? You may assume that your care provider will tell you everything you need to know, but that may or may not be true. After two very different pregnancies, I can tell you that "assuming" anything during pregnancy can lead to problems. Educating yourself as early as possible allows you to choose the right care provider, ask them the right questions and make educated decisions which you'll be less likely to regret later.

There are countless sources for pregnant women to get the information they need. There are even web pages and books which allow you to "countdown". My favorite during my last pregnancy was The Pregnancy Countdown Book: Nine Months of Practical Tips, Useful Advice and Uncensored Truths by Susan Magee. This book kept me sane during my horrible morning all-day sickness, when I gleefully looked forward to scribbling out the day with a big black marker. Some sites that allow you to "count up" are www.pregnancyguideonline.com and www.pregnancyweekly.com. They give you great information, and keep you updated on where your baby is in his or her development.

In addition to the classic pregnancy books like What To Expect While You're Expecting by Arlene Eisenberg and Heidi Murkoff, I really enjoyed the more down-to-earth tone of The Girlfriends' Guide To Pregnancy by Vicki Iovine. As a four-time mom herself, she divulges some of the not-so-common facts about pregnancy and childbirth that you won't find in other books. Celebrity Jenny McCarthy has also written a more casual pregnancy book called Belly Laughs. Websites are also great resources, as the articles provided change frequently and are often written by doctors or midwives. Some great sites for information on pregnancy are www.ivillage.com and www.pregnancy.com . Pregnancy.com also offers a great bulletin board with birth clubs tailored to the month of your due date. They are wonderful for asking questions, getting information, and making new mom friends.

When it comes to other sources of information, don't limit yourself to specific books or websites alone, particularly if you have an important question or concern. When researching during my first pregnancy, I would get terribly frustrated upon finding three or four credible resources with completely different information on some points. I had to read all of them and ask my doctor on some points. Generally, this meant that no one was sure. By looking at all of the available information on a question, I could decipher what the most up-to-date answer on an issue was. Although many people commit to their doctor and follow his or her advice unquestioningly, I will go out on a limb and say that this is not always the best course of action. The doctor is doing his or her job, and is human. Even the best-intentioned people make mistakes. And this is your pregnancy, your body, your child. You owe it to yourself to know what they're talking about.

So, is Hyperemesis a concept in physics? Can you find meconium at a hardware store? Is Episiotomy an Olympic sport? (Goodness, I hope not!) By educating yourself early on, you can make sure you and your baby have the best possible start for a healthy pregnancy.