The Dangers of Online Bullies

Years ago, parents worried about their kids getting physically beat up. However, today's parents also contend with cyber bullying, an even worse problem. Cyber bullying is a child, preteen, or teenager bothering, embarrassing, bullying, humiliating, or even threatening another child or teen online. It can also include bullying through cell phones and other digital devices.

How Cyber Bullying is Different

It's anonymous--Unlike physical bullies, cyber bullies can remain anonymous, as they're able to use temporary email accounts, as well as pseudonyms in chat rooms. Through instant messaging and cell phone texting, they're able to cover up their real identity. Where they may be less bold when confronting a victim in person, they're more threatening in communicating their messages of hate and fear.

No audience--As most cyber bullying is done in private, there's no one else around to witness the crime. Because email and chat logs are visible to only the sender and recipient, there's less chance of others knowing the harm being done. Also, teens are more technical than their parents, and are often able to get away with internet crimes without their parents even being aware of what's being done on a computer.

Use of video cameras--Besides cruel text messages and emails, cyber bullies can also use computer video cameras to terrorize their victims. What's more, built-in digital cameras in cell phone are also used to bully other kids.

What Parents Can Do to Protect Their Children

Too often parents make the mistake of telling their kids to ignore a bully who physically attacks them. However, this is bad counseling as it doesn't help the child's self esteem, not teaching him (or her) to stand up for himself. The same is true when your child is bullied with technology. Instead, teach your child to defend himself in a peaceful manner.

Develop technical skills--Take courses in computer technology, learning how kids weave their evil strategies online.

Get more involved with your kids--By spending quality time with your teens, you can develop a relationship where they're freer to open up with you when they have problems. Tragically, many young people feel their parents don't care about the details of their lives, so they isolate themselves from their parents. Then, when it's too late, they get into trouble.

Relocate the computer--Insist that they can go online only in areas of the home where the rest of the family can see what they're doing. In other words, do not allow even personal laptops in bedrooms.

Teach computer etiquette--For example, stress the importance of never posting images or typing anything on the internet that they would not want the entire world to read or see. Explain how information you share online can remain there forever, impossible to delete.

Report abuses--If you know you child is being bullied online, don't hesitate to report the crime to the authorities. For online bullying, contact your ISP (internet service provider). For cell phone bullying, report the problem to your phone service provider.

Change emails and phone numbers--If the situation doesn't improve, but grows worse, it may be necessary to get new email addresses and phone numbers. Just as you would want to find social events for your physically bullied kids in the next town, you also need to "get out of town" online.

Finally, set rules for computer time and limit your time online yourself. In other words, encourage your teens to interact more with live people rather than spending hours at the computer or on their cell phones.

Originally published on Suite 101.