The Dating Game: Getting to Know Their Parents

You love your boyfriend, and he loves his mother. He loves you, and you have a special bond with your dad. So what do you do? I have two words for you...Brownie Points or Brown Nosing, which ever one floats your boat.

If you're looking for ways to get in good with the parents of that sweet thing that you just can't live without, then this article is for you: "The ultimate guide to scoring brownie points with your future in laws."

Offer your services for something you see that might need to be done. Or better yet, just do it. I recently came into the house to find my son's girlfriend folding the towels from my dryer. I thanked her and she admitted to loving the feel and smell of warm, freshly laundered towels. We suddenly had something in common. We spent a pleasant few minutes folding fluffy towels and washcloths and then I offered her a cup of coffee. We spent a very pleasant afternoon without my son even being in the house.

Encourage your parents to get to know one another. Recently we spent the weekend at the home of my daughter's fiancée and his parents. We had to be in their town for an event, and they opened their home to us rather than having us go to a hotel. We hit it off immediately. Now his mother and I talk on the phone almost daily. This may seem fairly insignificant now, but when two grandmothers in two different towns are trying to share a single baby...it will come in handy if they at least are on speaking terms.

What does Dad do in his spare time? My youngest daughter has discovered that she and her boyfriend's dad share a common interest in the "Law and Order" television shows. They can both sit and watch for hours and will argue about who they think did the crime, and then laugh at whoever was way off the mark when the case is solved.
But they are getting to know each other in a more relaxed setting. He told me he already thinks of her as family.

What do they like to eat? The fiancée has discovered my passion for Krispy Kreme doughnuts, and since we don't have one in our town, he will occasionally bring me a dozen when he drives the hour to see my daughter. The weekend we spent at his parents, he got up early to drive across town to bring me warm, freshly made glazed and chocolate iced treats. Just a word of advice here: When it comes to most Moms...chocolate is never wrong.

Show them that their son or daughter won't starve. My son's girlfriend makes a mean lasagna and an out of this world chocolate cake from scratch. She isn't afraid to jump in and help out in the kitchen when she's going to be at the house for dinner. We've swapped recipes, tips and cooking disaster stories. All the while building that bond we'll need if my son decides she's the one.

Spend time just spending time with each other. The boys love to play poker. They come over and play Texas Hold-em with my husband. The boyfriend has proven to be a good instructor. He was helping me learn to play last weekend, and I managed to clean house. I beat both of the boys, my son, my husband and the fiancée's father. At first I thought they were letting me win to earn more brownie points. Then I began to see the frustration on their faces as I kept winning hand after hand. Oops.

I love my children. I love the young men and woman that they've brought home. Mostly because these kids are just that...kids. They are themselves when they're around me. They don't try to put on airs or be someone they're really not. I do think however that I'm in the mood for a Cherry Coke from Sonic. I wonder if anyone's coming over tonight?