The Deal of a Lifetime

My eldest daughter, Brianne, is six years old and has yet to figure out the finer details concerning the makings of a deal. Not surprising coming from a child still young enough to think chores are fun and not request payment for them.

"Hey, Brie, I need you to help with laundry."

"Yes! All right! Chores!"

I wish I had that much enthusiasm (or any for that matter) when it comes to housework. How much simpler would life be if one jumped up and down in excited anticipation of washing a sink full of dishes? Course I would love to have just about any level of my children's seemingly endless supply of enthusiasm and energy. The one thing about being a kid I sorely miss. But let's get back to deal-making.

I was busy in the kitchen one evening when Brianne cautiously approached. She lingered at my elbow, smiling bashfully whenever I glanced her way. Obviously she was biding her time for the perfect moment in which to speak.

Finally..."Can you take me to the store tomorrow and buy me a toy, only one and never again?"

"Really," I chuckled, "If I buy you one toy tomorrow, just one, I never have to buy you another toy?"

"Yes, just one and never again, is it a deal?" Brianne's eyes were wide, her body jumpy with excitement.

"So, no toys for your birthday," Brianne's smile disappeared as I continued, "And I can inform Santa that he needn't bring you any toys on Christmas, right?"

The gears were furiously working across Brianne's face, "Um, but I need a toy for my birthday and for Christmas."

"But you said never again. I really, really, like this deal." I watched her face cloud with anger and could have sworn fine wisps of smoke were drifting from her ears as she huffily crossed her arms.

"Well, I don't like it!" She fumed, stomping off to her room where she undoubtedly began to scheme a way to get tomorrow's toy without jeopardizing future toy receiving.

On the wake of her huffy departure I realized I shouldn't have aggravated her over the request, as I was literally handed the deal of a lifetime, a parent's dream come true and blew it just to see her get worked up.

Parents can be such stinkers.

Originally published in the Daily Advocate, February 2008.

Bethany J. Royer-DeLong is currently entrenched at home fighting the good war against the gimmes and the I-don't-wannas. She blogs recklessly, as all mothers of children under the age of six should, and has been working on that "supposed" great American novel, times a dozen. You can visit her at motherofthemunchkins.blogspot.com and email her at broyerdelong@yahoo.com