The Decision to Become a Stay at Home Mother

My husband and I were both very career oriented people. He was in upper management and I was a graphic arts designer. We had been married for 4 years and decided that it was time to start our family. That meant of course that eventually one of us would have to stay home. I was going to be a mommy so I decided that staying home would be the best option for our family.

I continued to work up until about a week before my due date. I was so excited to be having a baby. I was thankful that my husband's job would support our family without me having to work. The day came and it was time to quit my job. I was terrified.

Here I am sitting on the couch with this wonderful bundle of joy. I was happy and yet very confused. I knew that being home for my child was the best in his interest, but I just felt like a part of me was missing. I was wondering if switching name tags to only "Mommy" was going to be sufficient.

The days and weeks went by. I thought that it would get better. When we first became a single income home things were wonderful. We were on top of the clouds, but now "Mommy" was missing the day to day challenge of the workplace. I felt alone and wanted some company, even if that company was only customers and a boss. The guilt that comes along with feeling that way is unimaginable.

Being a woman you figure that you were placed on Earth to get married and have children. What was this drive inside of me that longed for something more than what "Mommy" offered? My husband was great most of the time. He would try and notice when I kept the house clean and made his favorite meal, but still something was missing.

A year or two passed and we began realizing that making it on just one income was a very difficult thing to accomplish. The savings account I had made while working was now gone and we still had a baby to care for. My husband's job required so many hours that he was unable to take on a second. I on the other hand had all this time and talent that I couldn't put to use. The cost of a babysitter or daycare would take the place of any potential paycheck.

A miracle happened. My husband had been on the job with the same company for a number of years so they decided to give him a raise. This in turn became time to have a second child. I knew for sure that I was ready to be the "Mommy of two."

We were so very excited to be having our second child. We were having another baby boy! Things were looking great. My husband's job was paying him more money, our family was beginning to grow, and life could not have been more wonderful. Five days before Christmas the most unimaginable thing happened, my husband lost his job. We went from a double income no kids all the way to a family of four without employment. My husband decided to become self employed. This step saved our family. "Mommy" was not the only one at home anymore and "Daddy" was around to help. Two years later he is still self employed and things are looking up. It can be a very scary place to be when you go from two incomes to only one, but if you will stick with each other and not become enemies you can overcome many things.