The Delivery

Someone was knocking at the door. Jim thought it might be the wolf. Who is it, he asked. It's me, Johnny Carson, someone replied. No it isn't, Jim said. You're just trying to be funny. Alright, the unknown someone replied. I'm not, you're quite right. Just open the door, will ya? Look, Mr. X, Jim said; this is my door and quintessentially speaking I open it when I see fit and right now is not such a moment. But I'm just the pizza delivery guy, Mr. X said. You made a purchase online with Domino's, didn't you? And here I am, just kindly trying to deliver your order. But what about this Johnny Carson nonsense, Jim said. Oh that, Mr. X stuttered, I was just trying to be funny. It could have been anyone, Jim thought. Why then couldn't it have been some swell chick or something exciting like an escaped panther? Did I really order pizza? And if I did, what topping did I pick? Look here, Jim said. I'm gonna count to three. Drop the pizza and run for your life - I'm only telling you this once.

No answer. Well, silence is golden, Jim thought. Are you ready? he said. I'm coming out and you better not be there... Wait a second... Jim suddenly changed his mind. What if it really is the wolf? I better get my gun. Jim walked away to the living room and opened the little box for special occasions. Loaded and ready to go, Jim thought. He went back to the door. Hey Jooohnny... It's me, he said, somewhat spookily. Is the pizza still warm? Oh, I ate it, Mr. X said at the other side of the door. Thought you didn't want it. You... ate my pizza? Jim said, flabbergasted. What kind of a pizza delivery boy are you? Well, said Mr. X, I dare say we deliver pretty delicious pizzas and... it just looked so good. Are you from the IRS? Jim asked. Nah, I'm just someone who wants you well, Mr. X said. Open the door and I'll give you a specially selected gift. This is not real, Jim thought. This is not happening. I'm still in my bed, surely. If I open my eyes I will wake up. It's a dream... and I oughta be dreaming about sweet beaches and scantily clad females... It's time for lunch, Jim said. Whoever you are just let me inform you that I'm going to cook something. I'll be back in half an hour or so. Jim went to the kitchen, prepared some salad and pasta. I wonder what this day will be like, he thought.