The Dream of My Reality

It is early in morning of March 24th, 2007. Jim is sleeping on the outside but on the inside Jim has been repeating the same dream for the past week! The same dream plays out and goes by like as if it was new. Jim's alarm goes off around 6 AM. Eyes open yet tired and depressed he goes over to his journal and writes his dream down before getting ready for the day.

The entry reads: "There is a white car in the middle of the forest it is capsized. The two people in the car are okay and begin to turn the car right side up again. There is music playing in the background but is vague to my memory. Suddenly one of the two people from the car looks around in the dark and misty forest and see's zombies running around in the wood's thanks to the reflection of the moon. The zombies see the two people from the car. The two people are done making repairs and flip the car over and drive off again." Jim is a senior in high school who is dealing with the stresses of life he has a crappy part-time job and friends who make him question the way the act around him.

Through the course of the day Jim realizes his depression and negativity in the world and seeks to change it. After interpreting his dream Jim believes that he is running away from his fears instead of confronting them. Through this interpretation Jim realizes that he is subconsciously afraid of change and the unknown. However he also realized that he must go forward with his life and stabilize his life. With both aspects of the dream this has made is life boring and negative. Through this dream Jim realized that he has two choices. One choice is to continue being afraid and stay only in the known and never move on or the second choice to embrace change and stabilize.

The end of the day looms Jim writes an entry about his dream and current reality in waking life. The entry reads: "This dream comes back to me all the time. Sometimes I am alone and sometimes I am with others. When I am with others it happens to be my family. When I wake up it is a dull boring day and I either feel mad or depressed. Tonight I confront my demons and see what happens the following day. If these dreams go on any longer I do not know what I will do! Perhaps seek help? I want the dream to end so I can move on. I believe it is the stress pushing me in a bad position of mind and body. The stress of having to maintain friendships is a part of the problem. I have the stress of needing money and the stress of work and school. I need something new in my life. Something that needs me happy! But I do not know what. I remember 11th grade it was the best year of my life. I had my Friends, Job, Money, and Happiness. All I want is that feeling everyday. Everyday was the best day of my life. I want it back! I crave for it! I Desire It! What do I have to do?! God please tell me! This year I want my senior year or what is left of it to be like my junior year. Starting as soon as I get back from Spring break!

For some reason focusing on all the negativity in the world has made me lost sight of things I was once happy about. I do not wish to be ignorant but, I wish to be happy. I want to believe in something that can make me aware yet, happy at the same time. I usually do not write in my book unless it was a dream.
However, this recurring dream has a lot to do with who I have become and the person I was in the past. It has been so long since than that, I have forgotten who I was. It feels like I have been going through something very profound. I seek to find myself and a purpose for my life. I believe it is to help others. Lately, though I have been reverting to a more sensitive and serious lifestyle again, one that has not been seen since 5th to 9th grade! I have forgotten how to have with others. I guess it is just time to depart with one part of life and go onto the next. Its time to de-stress and focus on what is good in life. Since, I already know what bad and what bad is yet to come in life.

We have to go through life making the best of who we are and be grateful for what we have. It is time to move on. I am unsure what the future holds but I am sure it will be great! Because, of this I am so happy and grateful now that his realization has made me happy again, knowing that I have a sense of humor and have a level of wealth to accumulate before I actually need it. I can only be faithful to the fact that my life will turn around once I am done writing this entry. Faithful that it will be smoother and happier from here.
When I write about happiness I do not mean that aesthetic and temporary happiness I mean the real true happiness in life. I want the healthier body, the car and money. However, I also want the relationship, a real close together family and true feelings of happiness and purpose in life.

I have come now to yet another realization. These trial and tribulations that have been going on for the past 6 months are no one's fault but my own. Sure there were happy moments. However, there is nothing now to compare for from that of 11th grade. What I think about I will bring about and all I can do is adapt to the changes of life."

Before going to sleep Jim read his entry. Jim woke up the next morning with no recalling of zombies chasing him. Since that day in March his life has turned around events that he once dread are now events he looks forward to. Everything is less stressful and more fun. If there is any negative thing in life he trained himself to look at it as a lesson. Learn from the lesson and apply it and finally move on!