The New Economy: Fighting Through Joblessness

As a man, I hear the question all the time. "What do you do for a living?" I am sure women hear the question too, but it isn't the same. I can only imagine that since the beginning of time, for men, their job was their identity. I think if you looked at it from a genealogical standpoint, Shepherd's, Smith's, Baker's etc..would all be able to find someone in their family who held one of those occupations. So, as I read the New York Times recently, and thought about the large amount of men who are now finding themselves jobless due to the crumbling economy, I began to wonder what this means for men in this country.

A man without work is like a ship without a rudder. Not only do the jobs men do provide them with a sense of identity, it gives them purpose and direction. I think women are very lucky. They have multiple identities to deal with. Mother, Wife, Career. They also have an uncanny ability to multi-task. Men are very much problem solvers. Their mind loves to be engaged in a single activity. Whether that activity is on the ball field of their youth or the board room, men are energized and stimulated by what they do.

So, with more and more men out of work, what can they do to cope? How do they find their identity and maintain their sense of purpose when they find themselves at home at the mercy of those who will be receiving their resumes? It isn't a simple answer. But, I think there are three things that men should do to prove themselves as men amidst the circumstances.

First of all, while finding a new job should be a priority, being a helpful force at home is essential. Men should be responsible enough to help around the home. But, couples need to discuss their expectations. Together they must decide on what are the essential points of home front maintenance which the man should take on. Laundry, cleaning, childcare, etc..all must be done, but compromises should be made and understanding given for the time required to put together a successful job hunt.

Second, it is important for women to show their man respect. We all need love. Women who have stayed at home know, everyone needs to be shown appreciation for the sacrifices and work they do while at home to keep the family unit strong. But, men do not need love like women. They hunger for respect. Regardless of their circumstances. Loss of a job should not equate with loss of position within a family unit. They do not suddenly become a needy child. Just as a woman wants to be considered a vital part of the family, men too want to be thought of as an asset.

Finally, it is important that men are given encouragement. They are fighting a battle with significant consequences. They want to be a provider. They want to carve out a place for themselves in this world and although they could stem the tide of criticism and negativity from any and all sources outside of the home, their woman's tongue could destroy them. I think any man would sacrifice their lives for the woman they love, at some level. But that is destroyed without respect and love. So, if you are a woman who's man is out of work, encourage them to push on and succeed. Not because they need your guidance, but because they need and want your support.

As women's numbers grow within the workforce, they should be applauded for all their efforts. They bring diversity and important perspectives to business and other private and political arenas. They have proven themselves as leaders and responsible co-workers. But, let's not forget the men, who are just as important. Our men must succeed for this nation to be all it can be. Let's not forget that. Together we can do it.

Sources:
Catherine Rampell, "As Layoffs Surge, Women May Pass Men in Job Force", New York Times.