The Elitist Sport of Lacrosse: A Parent's Perspective

I grew up in Baltimore, Maryland, and spent many years living in Severna Park, a suburb of Annapolis. Both of my uncles and my godfather are graduates of Johns Hopkins University. My daughters played this sport since they were in elementary school. They grew up in a lacrosse-obsessed town in southern New Jersey, where both the boys' and girls' varsity and travel lacrosse teams were actually highly revered. Because of these facts, more so than perhaps as much as 80% of the American population, I am quite familiar with the game of lacrosse at the high school, college and national level.

It is, perhaps, because of my familiarity with lacrosse - a sport that has its roots as a truly all American sport, originated and played by Native Americans - that I have a somewhat jaded attitude as a parent and a spectator.

Even ESPN doesn't carry collegiate games on their regular channels, relegating it instead to its lesser-found ESPNU (university) channel. You won't see it on any of the more mainstream networks, cable or otherwise. It's far easier to find an international soccer match than a lax showdown between Syracuse and Cornell.

The publicity that the sport has garnered over the past couple of years has been focused on the negative: the men's lacrosse team at Duke University from four years ago, several of whose members were accused of raping a stripper at a house party; the tragic, senseless death of Yeardley Love, a four-year player on the University of Virginia's women's team, allegedly killed by her former boyfriend, also a lacrosse player at UVA, in a fit of rage so horrific that she was literally beaten to death. Other than these shameful incidents, I dare you to name two - okay, make that one - male or female lacrosse player at the collegiate level.

A sport that was played by the original occupants of the United States, the Native Americans, was often played before heading into battle, as a means of psyching up the courage and morale of imminent warriors. While we've evolved a long way since the game was first played with crudely hand-formed sticks and mud balls, the mindset of the warrior player hasn't really changed all that much.

Lacrosse found its way into the upper echelon universities of American, and became a staple among varsity sports at predominantly East Coast Ivy League schools, both high school preparatory and at the college level. Because of this history of elitism going back over a century, lacrosse is often rightfully viewed as the sport of the 'upper class', the privileged - those able to attend or send their children to expensive, selective schools. (One of the rare exceptions to this 'rule' was Jim Brown, legendary NFL great at Syracuse University in football and lacrosse. He was, unfortunately, the only African American on his lacrosse team there. Brown had faced prejudice head-on on both the gridiron and the lacrosse fields during his college career.) Even to this day, predominantly male lacrosse players and graduates of Ivy League schools - particularly those working on New York's Wall Street - continue to play in 'club' leagues decades after their college graduation.

The equipment required to play the sport is, frankly, not particularly expensive, especially when you compare it to the equipment needed for football, ice hockey, and crew (another Ivy League favorite). It's the training costs that can punch a hole in the wallet. The game is based largely on speed. Coaches at both the high school and college level often mandate that prospective and current players train at athletic facilities designed to increase their footwork and speediness. There are also lacrosse camps throughout the year, both indoor and outdoor, recreation leagues (which are usually opened to anyone wishing to learn to play), and 'club' or 'travel' programs for both men and women. Being accepted into a travel program from the age of ten and up is a huge commitment for the young player and their parents. There are assessed dues, mandatory fundraising, special uniforms to be purchased for the team, tournament fees, and, interestingly enough, rather substantial travel costs involved. Travel teams usually participate in tournaments and 'mini tournaments' up and down the East Coast, which means that transportation must be provided for the player, as well as the cost of hotel rooms and food. One tournament for a travel team player can cost in excess of $300 - and there are usually at least five or six tournaments scheduled for a travel team, often more. In addition, these travel teams often require 'special' training with speed trainers, goal keepers' trainers, and scrimmages against other area teams in preparation for their tournaments. None of this 'special' training is free. A travel lacrosse season can easily cost upward of $2500 per child. These travel programs, for both boys and girls, and starting as young as ten, are a genuine financial burden on most families - unless you're so well-off that a few thousand dollars here, a few thousand again next year - is not a problem for you. And coaches at the high school level pretty much cherry-pick their potential players from these travel teams. Kids who've participated in them will have a significantly higher level of balls skills and playing experience than those who do not. In our own lax-obsessed town, the girls' high school coach pretty much determines by the start of the sixth grade who will be playing on her team within the next three years. I've seen it happen. My friends, whose children also played at one level or another, also saw it happen as well.

We've seen families who are extremely generous financially to a lacrosse program get handsomely rewarded for their donations in the form of team uniforms, special jackets, hosting pre and post-game parties at their homes, providing meals for the entire team at their expense, even one family who donated an electronic scoreboard. (It wasn't until the past two years that the school board mandated that these "gifts" be approved by the board prior to the coach accepting them. Until then, these donations were blatantly made: all of the other kids on the team knew whose mother paid for nicely catered dinners the night before a game, or paid for custom jackets or breakaway pants. And all of the kids knew - and expected - that the child of that mother would be treated differently - often in the form of special 'training sessions' with the head or assistant coach. Paying for lessons from a varsity coach was strictly forbidden, hence the 'training sessions' given the rich kid instead.) One parent even 'donated' one of his company's empty warehouses to be used as a free, indoor training facility (lacrosse training goes on year round, either through travel, school, and winter indoor programs) for his daughter's school team. His daughter, in return, received extensive coaching from one of the assistants, as well as a starting spot on the varsity roster. I've seen her play. Her skill set is surprisingly poor, but her play quite aggressive - it must be a recessive genetic trait.

My own daughters both played, and very much liked the sport. One was quite fast, but not cut throat competitive, so her career ended with her freshman year. The other is extremely tall and had great ball skills, but kept getting checked in the head. (It's hard to legally check a 6' tall girl on attack. After her second concussion, it was mutually decided to move on to another sport.) Over an eight year period, I was involved in one way or another with our local lacrosse program, and to this day I'll attend a local high school game just for the fun of watching the sport.

As a parent, would I consider lacrosse players to have an elitist mentality? From my first-hand experience as a parent, as a fan of the sport, and as friends with parents whose sons and daughters played at varying levels, I would have to say that it truly is. Because its mindset is so deeply ingrained in the Ivy League colleges and prep schools - again, mainly on the East Coast, centering outwards from Baltimore to Long Island to Connecticut down to Delaware and the Main Line - I don't see it changing anytime in the near future. How many African American or Hispanic players have you seen on a college team lately?

If you're a fan of the television show 'Friday Night Lights', you'll recall that the theme of last season, extending into this year, is that of a wealthy man taking over his son's high school program, literally, and running off the good-guy coach who treated his son as just another member of the team. If you think for a minute that this is just a 'Texas football win at all costs' mentality, think again. It happens in all sports, to one degree or another. In lacrosse, it's just much more blatant...