The "Glee" of Deadpan: What Will Brittany Say Next?

The hit TV show "Glee" has a lot of attributes that fans love: a great cast, fun story lines, awesome songs and a terrific script, just to name a few. Even though she doesn't have a very large role (in comparison to the core Gleeks Finn, Rachel, Kurt, Quinn and even Artie), Brittany S. Pierce (played skillfully by Heather Morris) has some of the funniest quotes heard on "Glee."

Quote:When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist.
Episode: The Power of Madonna(Season 1, Episode 15)
Context: Mr. Schuester (Matthew Morrison) talks to the male members of the Glee Club about their treatment of the female members, saying, "Guys, you know, it's come to my attention that many of you haven't been treating the young ladies of our group very nicely lately. You're disrespectful, bullying, sexist, and, I hate to say it, misogynistic." Brittany says to no one in particular, "When I pulled my hamstring, I went to a misogynist."
Why it's funny: For those of you that do not know the definition, a misogynist is someone who hates women and treats them badly. Obviously, Brittany means that she went to get a massage. Instead of saying she got a massage or went to a masseuse, she says that she went to a massage-onist. It is one of those lines that makes the viewer have the same reaction that Mr. Schue does... just shaking his head and thinking, "What?" The viewer, of course, laughs in addition.

Quote: Is God an evil dwarf?
Episode: Grilled Cheesus (Season 2, Episode 3)
Context: After Kurt's father (Mike O'Malley) suffers a heart attack and ends up in the hospital in a coma, the Glee Club members pray for him. Athiest Kurt (Chris Colfer) doesn't want any prayers. When Mercedes (Amber Riley) tells Kurt that he can't prove that there is no God, Jurt retorts, "You can't prove there isn't a magic teapot floating around the dark side of the moon with a dwarf inside of it that reads romance novels and shoots lightning out of its boobs; but it seems pretty unlikely doesn't it?"
Why it's funny: During a heated discussion about God and religion, Brittany cuts the tension with genuine concern that God is an evil dwarf. It is such a throwaway line that no one has any time to react, especially since Quinn tries to stop the discussion right after Brittany's line. It is so unexpected, and a welcome interjection to a discussion that can make people feel pretty uncomfortable.

Quote:Sometimes I forget my middle name.
Episode:Hell-O (Season 1, Episode 14)
Context: Coach Sylvester (Jane Lynch) has just finished a meeting with her Cheerios, and concludes it by asking, "Anything else?" Brittany responds with that little nugget of information.
Why it's funny: First of all, the line is completely unexpected, as is so much of what Brittany says. Secondly, who forgets their middle name???

Quote: I'm going as a peanut allergy.
Episode: Rocky Horror "Glee" Show(Season 2, Episode 5)
Context: Kurt asks Brittany what she is going to be for Halloween.
Why it's funny: There are a few layers of comedy to this line. Exactly how does one dress as a peanut allergy? A peanut, sure, but an allergy is a little difficult to imagine. Peanut allergies are actually very frightening to a lot of people, as it can cause death depending on the level of allergy the person has. When you think about it, going as a peanut allergy is rather clever. However, it makes one wonder... Exactly how would Brittany dress as a peanut allergy?

Quote: Please don't pull out all my teeth. I'll look like an adult baby, but with boobs.
Episode: Brittany/Britney (Season 2, Episode 2)
Context: Brittany is seeing dentist Dr. Carl (John Stamos) for the first time, and makes this request before going under anesthesia.
Why it's funny: It is clear that Brittany either never has been to or simply fears the dentist. To ask Dr. Carl not to pull out all of her teeth is one thing, simply because it could be out of fear of pain or losing teeth. Many people fear the dentist. However, Brittany continues with a description of what she would look like if she was missing all of her teeth. She apparently gave a lot of thought to losing all of her teeth, and what she would look like without them.