The Hairy Question of Mo'Nique's Choice to Go Hirsute

Talk show host/reality star/comedian/Oscar winning actress Mo'Nique has not shaved the hair on her legs for well over two decades. Like a surprisingly high number of women, once-shaven hair often grows back more quickly, thicker, unruly and more unsightly in the eyes of some beholders. Mo'Nique discussed this fact with Barbara Walters on Walter's 2010 (and final) pre Oscar interview with award nominees. What amused me greatly was that the subject even came up for discussion, especially in light of the powerful, gritty and heart-stopping performance in 'Precious' for which Mo'Nique won her Oscar. (Then again, Walters is known for wasting precious interview time with her Oscar guests in the past; at least she didn't ask Mo'Nique what kind of tree she would be.) As it turned out, the actress' performance was based to a large extent on an incestuous relationship during childhood with an older brother - a fascinating fact that left me wanting more questions, more answers. How did she overcome this abuse? DID she ever overcome it and come to terms with it? Did she harbor feelings of bitterness and resentment towards her parents, her other family members, because of it?

Instead, Walters went for the money shot with the question about Mo'Nique's decision not to shave her legs. During the televised interview, the camera actually panned to a shot of her legs, nicely tucked together below a longer hem line. Props to the actress for answering Walter's queries with dignity and honesty, and gently deflecting the conversation back into relevant territory.

The sight - or even the thought - of unshaven female body areas - the legs, the underarms, has always drawn contempt in this century's American sense of propriety. Rocker Patti Smith's album cover for her 'Easter' album was actually removed from view in record stores in the south and Bible Belt during the '70's. We twitter about European women with arm hair, especially the French. A recent national commercial featured a man and woman on a bicycle built for two; the woman, in the front seat, had unshaven underarm hair that appeared to be at least two feet long: dirty, string, matted, and blowing intermittently in the face of the poor man seated behind her. The tag line for the actress was "What, you think this is wrong?..." The message was fairly clear: the woman cyclist was a dirty, stupid, unsophisticated hippie-dippy woman who had slightly lost her mind. For some reason, women with visible body hair on their legs and underarms are thought to be low-class, charmless individuals, too lazy to take care to make themselves 'presentable' by shaving those areas. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and those eyes are trained by individual preference developed through culture and upbringing. If a girl's mother expressed disgust with a hint of hair showing on a leg or underarm, the message being sent is pretty clear: a hairy body is a disgusting body.

But does being hirsute - a condition with which individuals are born - make for a 'bad' person? I would hope that people would look beyond a physical condition - not unlike acne, less than perfect teeth, oversized ears, freckles, big feet - that doesn't define someone by its presence.

This subject struck a particular chord with me. I have daughters with lush, thick, long and beautiful hair. They have always been blessed with great hair, even right out of the shower. But with a full, thick head of hair often comes hair in body places unwanted. I remember one daughter almost in tears because she had visible hair on her hands and knuckles. Both girls spent small fortunes on waxing kits and lasering for their legs and underarms. For one of them, the presence of what she felt was excessive body hair became almost an obsession. Adolescence is hard enough without having to lug around the physical 'shame' of too much hair on a young body - especially since nearly every actress and model shown appeared to be as hair-free as a skinned chicken cutlet. She eventually outgrew her obsession (and still has gorgeous, long, thick hair on her head).

Give the hirsute ladies of the world a chance, America. Look beyond Mo'Nique's legs and respect her decision to focus on the really important things in life, including a knock-out, Oscar winning professional performance. Beauty, truly in the eye of the beholder, really is only skin deep.