The Happiness Set Point and Why Things Don't Make Us Any Happier

We all want something in life and we often think that by getting what we want will make us happy. But how often is it that we do get what we want but after a short period of euphoria we slump back to feeling like we've always felt. This return to a prior feeling of happiness after something of a surge is what psychologist's call the set point of happiness. What this means is that we all have our own internal set point of happiness and despite what happens to us it is to this level of happiness that we will all eventually gravitate towards. This also implies that no matter what you get you will, after a time, feel no happier. In support of this, several studies have shown that after a while many lottery winners reported to feeling no different from how they felt before they won their fortune. Also newly weds after a year or two of higher levels of happiness find that they often return to their own pre-wed state of happiness. This return to the happiness set point involves the process of adaptation, where the individual 'adapts' to the change that has occurred, in other words they become accustomed, in this case to their new found love and wealth.

The reason for adaptation and a happiness set point may lie in the way our nervous systems are constructed, remembering that our nervous systems are not there for our benefit but to ensure our survival. Our nervous systems are primarily concerned with responding to change which is where the greatest threats to our survival lurks. Also admittedly change can present the greatest opportunity. It is not in our interest to continually respond to an unchanging environment because by definition it does not pose any threat or opportunity and therefore would represent a waste of energy to continually respond to it. It is much more important, therefore, that our nervous system responds to change, such as being chased by a wholly mammoth rather than by a quiet night in the cave by the camp fire. The same is true if we win the lottery or fall in love, our nervous system responds accordingly to these massive changes in this case with an increase in happiness. But after awhile the love or the money have become a permanent feature of our personal landscape so our nervous system no longer needs to respond to this and we revert to how we felt before. We have adapted and we fall back to our prior happiness set point. Of course if love or money leaves us there is a massive change in our environment and we respond accordingly. Also, it is important to understand that the purpose of 'feeling happy' is not there necessarily for our benefit, these feelings exists primarily to cause us to move towards pleasure and move away from pain. Of course once pleasure and pain are gone or we have adapted to their presence then we revert back to our normal or default happiness state. Therefore, no matter what you do or what happens to you after an initial feeling of euphoria you will likely end up feeling no different to what you felt before. This may cause some consternation to many because if nothing is going to make us happier then what's the point of action or activity directed specifically to improve our lives. However, this process of adaptation and the happiness set point are just normal facets of physiology and psychology. But by their acceptance it allows us to be prepared and to be less disappointed by life as we revert back to a lower level of happiness after some highly exciting and often engineered life change. There may also be some truth in the old adage that more life changes the more it stays the same and this may indeed refer to adaptation and the happiness set point.

Most people are probably able to assess their own happiness rating (HR) or degree of life satisfaction on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being blissfully ecstatic and 1 being suicidal despair. This is purely an emotional assessment. For example at the moment of writing my general view of my life is a 7/10. Interestingly my HR assessment seems to only work in broad terms, for example I can only assess my HR in block numbers, I can't seem to self evaluate my HR as anything like 7.25, 7.5 or 7.75, I can only do 7 or 8, but this is also probably normal as there is no need for such fine discrimination, as a broad 'up' or 'down' in happiness terms is enough of a signal. Overall there appears to be a crudity to HR with no fine or subtle discrimination. Although, some people may say that they can be aware of finer degrees of emotionality.

To further exemplify the happiness set point a little autobiography may be relevant here. I used to live in London and I had a job as a business writer which I enjoyed and at the time I gave myself a HR of 7/10. I got married and my own life rating understandably went up to 8/10. However, this was short lived as I had problems at work mainly with the owner/boss of the company. This was quite clearly a no-win situation and this caused my HR to fall 6/10 and at times may be even 5/10. Quite clearly this drop in HR was a call for some sort of action. In response to this my wife and I decided to sell up and go to live in Thailand where I wouldn't have to work and I could effectively semi-retire. Once I left the company my HR rose and became the steady and very familiar 7/10 and remained at this level during the next few months as we planned out getaway. Once in Thailand we were initially living in a hotel and coupled with a general sense of unease my HR dropped to 6/10. But then we bought a house and a car and we slowly began to build a new life. Things progressed and we became more settled and my HR rose to 7/10 and then we had a baby and for a time my HR rose to 8/10 but gradually this dropped back to 7/10. It must be remembered that having a baby is very challenging and stressful. However, what is readily and obviously apparent here is that my current HR of 7/10 was the exactly the very same HR level that I had in London before I got married and moved countries. Just look at all the massive changes that I had enacted in this brief story only to find that my HR had not changed at all. All these big changes had obviously not made me any happier. Somebody assessing this would clearly have said the obvious solution to my drop in HR was just simply to get another job, with no need to get married, have a child or move countries. If you examine the amount of energy expended in all these life changes it's huge and nothing in contrast to simply getting a new job. But this is a perfect example how despite all the massive life changes my own happiness level merely gravitated to my own happiness set point of 7/10. This also has implications for the future in that no matter what I do my HR will always revolve around this figure. This can be quite distressing for some and shows clearly that nothing will ever make us any happier.

However, there is another way to look at our lives. Instead of viewing life from the emotionality of the HR it is possible to view one's life more rationally. If do this and look at my life rationally then I find that my life is indeed better and as a direct result of my actions. My life is better being married, it is better having a child and it is much better living a semi-retired life in Thailand. The only thing is this is not reflected in my emotional based happiness level, which is fixed anyway. Therefore, it is much easier and more satisfying by looking at ones life in this way than having to rely purely on 'emotional' feelings which one has little control over anyway, the happiness set point being fixed that is. Overall our feelings may not change but our appreciation and analysis of our life can. So when you do things and after a while the old HR drops to what it was before, there is no need for despair it's just a case of normal adaptation back to the happiness set point. However, there is now this golden opportunity to view rationally whether indeed your life has improved. You have control here and you decide, and not your emotions, what has been worthwhile and what hasn't.