The Horrible Poop Explosion: Taking Baby on the Road

Here's the scenario: my baby was mysteriously silent in her carseat on the way home. When I arrived, I prepared to take the little bundle of joy out and praise her for her sweetness - and as she smiled when I reached for her, I saw the eggyolk-yellow puddle of goo she was sitting in. Her one-size-up diapers hadn't been quite enough to contain the horrible poop explosion that had made her so happy and calm.

There was a quick fix for this one - take the carseat, baby and all, to the shower, and spray the whole mess down with warm water - but I started thinking. What about all those other problems? What about the time I ran out of diapers while chaperoning a Boy Scout hike, and one poor young man had to give up his neckerchief to my son? (some "be prepared" example I was that day!) Or the day I forgot to breastfeed, and had a screaming baby and nowhere private to feed her in the mall but a changing room?

1. Instead of worrying when you go out, keep a couple of large diapers and sealed baby wipes in your car emergency kit. The diaper bag should be a separate supply. Why? Because sometimes we run out of diapers in the diaper bag. If you have one in the car emergency kit, you won't think of using it until it's really an emergency.

2. Keep a large thick towel in the same place. A towel is a wonderful thing (with all due respect to Douglas Adams). It can keep your baby warm in an emergency, dry him off, wipe off mishaps from either end, or work as emergency clothing. It soaks up spills in the car, and can even work as a comforting toy, especially if it's brightly colored. And had I been on the road with my poop machine when the terrible thing happened, it would have been ideal for covering the carseat until I got home where I could clean it. Come to think of it, keeping a couple of towels on hand isn't a bad idea.

3. Babies turn you into an idiot. Seriously. Before driving ANYWHERE, get a spare car key and house key, and put them in a magnetized box under your wheelwell (you should be able to find these at most auto supply stores). You will forget or lose your keys at some point, and chances are good that when you do, you'll lock them inside your car with your purse and cellphone, and possibly the baby. If you have a spare key hidden on the car itself, this is no longer a disaster.

4. Extra clothes, and a swimsuit or swim diaper if you live anywhere near water, are wise to have. Use clothes that are a little too large, as you don't want to pull out your six-month-old emergency stash only to find it has shrunk over time.

5. A full water bottle. If something happens and you're stuck out in traffic, you may not be able to get to refreshments, and children get thirsty. If you're breastfeeding, the water can keep you from getting dehydrated; if you're not, you know that your baby will have something he can drink.

Besides all this, more mundane things are also wise: a stash of toys your baby hasn't seen before; a list of emergency contacts stashed in your purse, the baby bag, and the glove box of the car; a filled and checked baby bag; burp cloths. With all this preparation, you will easily win the baby war, and your small dictator will retire the field, defeated but happy.