The Impact of Image

Let's take a moment to face reality. We mold our children - from their health to their personalities - from the time they are infants. According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC) in 2007-2008 nearly one-third of adults were obese. Even more frightening the CDC claims from 1998-2008 nearly one in seven low-income, preschool-age children were obese....that's right Preschool age! I have to be honest, as a parent and a nutrition and fitness expert I've always blamed the family environment for obesity in children. Children have no real control over the food choices presented to them, they aren't capable of making the decision to sit in front of the t.v. for 10 hours a day; these are things a good parent or primary care-giver should be cautious of - teaching children proper behaviors for their health. Now I'm starting to wonder how much of a child's body image is affected by society, the things they hear and feel; could this increase in obesity in youth have the same source as in Adults? Here's the thing, obesity in an adult is rarely about what they eat and how they exercise - these are only symptoms of the problem. They true source of the problem is body image/self-esteem. Could children as young as preschool have low self-esteem leading them to self-medicate with food just as some adults do? How can we help our children realize their full potential and promote healthy self-image as well as habits? It all comes back to the primary care givers.

I've begun to see the reality with my youngest child. He just turned 6 years old. Both my sons were large babies, my youngest was about a month early and 8 lbs. So he always had that adorable baby fat on him. I remember after bath time I would blow bubbles on his belly, saying in a high-pitched voice, "look at that fat belly!" Not being mean, it never occurred to me to associate baby fat with adult fat. My father would always play with their legs and belly, saying he loved the "ham-hocks" babies get. Heck, we even have a big cat that we call "fat cat" with affection. If my kids finish their dinner quickly we even jokingly call them little piggies.

I further have to admit that as a woman, and a former anorexic myself, I still have bouts of body dysmorphic - seeing myself as obese. On these days I'll have trouble finding anything to wear, and I'll exercise like a fiend. I'll also complain to my husband about my weight. Never thinking about little ears picking up on these comments. It also never occurred to me to sensor news stories on obesity, or shows like The Biggest Loser. As home-schoolers I'm all about using the world around us as a class room, and I'll use the news and weight loss shows to teach my children about healthy habits. It never occurred to me I could also be teaching them about the stigma attached to weight.

As a stated about 4 months ago I noticed a change in my youngest son. He began telling me he had to exercise. One day I heard my oldest asking my youngest what he was doing, "exercising" he replied. When my oldest asked him why he was exercising my youngest replied, "because I'm fat". I almost fell off the couch! We've begun changing our habits a bit, trying to encourage healthy body images in us all, it's been working. Instead of focusing on his stomach he shows everyone his biceps, but I wish he didn't feel the need to be conscious of his body at all. But I've come to realize in this modern society that would be almost impossible.

From diet pills, shakes, bars, etc to exercise equipment advertised on tv, to the news and weight loss shows the idea of body image is pervasive in our society. So, how can we ensure our children develop positive self-images?

First, change you to change them. No more standing in front of the mirror hating your own body. Your children can obviously pick up on that. They love you, they look up to you, they trust your judgment. If you say something is wrong with anything then they'll believe you. You say you're fat or wrong in form, then later joke about their own fat...they won't understand you're not talking about the same thing. In their little minds they'll equate the unhappiness you showed the mirror to what you'll eventually show them. This is the start.

Second, don't comment on their bodies, except in a positive manner; always keeping in mind they don't yet understand the idea of words having multiple definitions. Be positive, "you are perfect, just the way you are!" Don't fall into the reverse category by constantly commenting on their strength or skinny-ness, as this still draws much attention to their image, and can develop into obsessing to stay skinny/strong.

Third, be honest about food choices. Don't say we're steering clear of candy/junk because you'll get fat, explain that these foods are made with unnatural chemicals and aren't good for the body. The body is like a car - you have to give it sufficient gas to make the car run right - food is the gas, if the food/gas is of poor quality then the body/car will be sluggish and might break down. Put these complicated concepts into terms they can understand - without it being a huge deal. My children are allowed cake at birthdays (although I almost never allow soda - because anything that makes an excellent toilet bowl cleaner doesn't need to go in my children's bodies). But at home we have healthy snacks like nuts and fruits. Why? Because these come from nature and we're animals just like our pets. The more natural a food, the better our body can use it's nutrients - just like litter can make the soil unhealthy for a tree, unnatural foods can be unhealthy for our bodies.

Finally, encourage healthy physical pursuits. Have your children join a sport - soccer, karate, swimming, whatever they enjoy. Not because it's exercise and will help keep them skinny, but because it's FUN! I think kids have forgotten what 'fun' is. I remember being a kid and finding a box-spring matress by the side of the road. My brothers and I had fun for hours jumping on the stupid thing. In our house the tv is off during the day, unless someone is ill. Now I don't allow the kids to watch the news (except the weather, as they LOVE the weather reports for some weird reason..lol). The news is full of unpleasant concepts young children won't fully understand, so they needn't be exposed to them.

For the most part be honest with you children about the processes occurring in their bodies - putting these concepts into terms they can understand. Taking some of the amazement out of the process will help them make such things into less than society sometimes elevates them. Let them know the way they look, the way they're growing, everything about them is exactly as it was ment to be. Remember, say nothing about habits leading to obesity and nothing about comparing them to others. We are the sculptors of the future, we as parents and guardians, it's up to us to guide our children to become the very best and healthy they can be, both in body and in mind.

For more on Body Dysmorphic Disorder check out Medicine Net