The Journey of Christmas Stress
A Humorous Poem About Our Holiday Anxiety
Decorations and cookies and sparkly lights
I patiently understand the waiting in lines
And I have not yet encountered a parking lot fight
CHRISTMAS IS COMING; I see it at the malls
The children in line to see Old St. Nick
Thousands of kids dressed in their holiday best
Ninety-nine percent of them coughing and sick!
CHRISTMAS IS COMING; I HEAR THOSE DARN BELLS!
As I wander from store to store
I dropped a few coins in one of the buckets
And the guy said, "Hey, can't you give any more?"
CHRISTMAS IS COMING! THE PACKAGES ARE PILING HIGH!
WAITING TO BE DECORATED WITH RIBBONS AND BOWS!
This wrapping paper stinks; I can't cut a freaking straight line
And the tape from the dollar store just really blows!
CHRISTMAS IS COMING! CAN'T YOU FEEL THE SPIRIT?
I WANDER THROUGH THE MALLS - LOST IN A FOG
LOOKING FOR THE GIFTS THAT WERE PUT ON A LIST
JUST GET ME HOME TO MY COUCH AND THE SPIKED EGG NOG!
Christmas is coming! I have found my calm
It was buried beneath the pile of what I still have to do
But I pulled it out; I can handle the holidays
I have changed my attitude; it is positive and new!
Just make sure you show a little kindness
Don't expect miracles; that is not my thing
Don't make fun of my holiday cookies
Don't snicker when Christmas carols I try to sing!
Follow these rules and your holiday will be peaceful
No stress or angst will come your way
We can all get along and enjoy the festivities
And maybe even survive until Christmas Day!
Published by Donna Cavanagh
I like to make people laugh. My newest humor book "Reality: Fantasy's Evil Twin" is now available on Amazon. My other humor book "Life on the Off Ramp" and my poetry book "Poems for a Positive Day II" were... View profile
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25 Comments
Post a CommentDonna, I'm in trouble. I actually stuck my 2 small dogs in the tree because I didn't feel like decorating.. Be honest, how bad have I got it?
I really enjoyed this poem--I particularly liked the line with 99% of the kids sick dressed up to see Santa!
another great one...give me some of that booze while you're at it, us bugs like a mug or a jug of some good stuff to slug down :D
Dang! And there I was, a mail carrier, experiencing no Christmas stress... Now I know that CHRISTMAS IS COMING!!!!!!!
Yes, the holiday stress is upon us. And even crazier this year w/ Wikileaks holding up our paychecks, lol
another great addition to the poetry of the season...seems like we all get a bit STRESSED during the holidays, but as you noted DRINKING helps a lot, pass the eggnog LOL!
This was so precise! I love how you changed the tone in this!
You can take us on a a journey of self and are so wonderfully creative...thanks Donna!
Jack, it's amazing how you knew I would get troubled by the word "cute" . You are a lot like your brother. :)
Your two voices here are great.