The Last Day on Earth

He had not been expecting a letter. Not from her, anyway. He was so surprised, he fell off his chair. He held the letter with shaking hands. Should he open it? He decided he might as well. He had 23 minutes left to live, anyway.

There was no paper inside the envelope. Just a crumpled napkin. The napkin had one sentence: I forgive you.

He sighed. She forgave him. He was not expecting that. He had ruined her life, forever. He was paying for his sins. He had one unspoken wish before he died. His wish was that he would know she would be OK. He was filled with regret because of what he had done. Now, it seemed God (whoever He was) had granted him his wish. He closed his eyes and said a prayer to thank God that his one wish had been fulfilled.

He looked at the clock. Ten minutes left to live. He looked around. Shouldn't he be doing something? He felt guilty doing nothing. But there was nothing to do. Nothing to do but think. He thought about his life. It was a miserable one. He had a mother who abused him emotionally. He could still see her face yelling at him for not being good enough. Not being perfect. He thought about his father too. His father who molested him when he was eleven. The thought was too painful.

Surely, there must have been something good in his life. Someone, something that was good. His sister, she was good. She was the only one who was there for him throughout this ordeal. Throughout his life she was the only one who tried to show her he cared. True, she was not perfect. But she had tried to live a good life. She had tried to call him to check on him. She had wanted to be there when he executed. Wanted to bring him some of his favorite foods. But he told her no. He preferred to be alone.

He looked at his belongings. Should he give them away? What did he have to give away? All he had was his damn pornography magazines. That's what got him in this mess in the first place. They were his addiction. The one thing he could not live without. All because he could not control the urge. He shook his head. He did not want to think anymore. He had five minutes left to live. He just wanted to get it done and over with.

He called out, "Come and kill me already! I want to die!" Nobody answered. Nobody cared about him. And who could blame them? He was a disgusting man. All the other prisoners looked at him with hatred. The prison psychiatrist tried to be professional and all, but she did not like him either. She smiled at him with a fake smile. He asked her why she even bothered to see him. Her reply, "It is my job. Somebody's got to do it." He allowed himself to smile. At least, she was honest.

Four minutes left to live. He read the letter again. He did not deserve forgiveness. But he was glad she had forgiven him. Not only for himself. But for herself, as well. He understood what bitterness could do to a person. His own mother was an unforgiving woman. She never forgave his father for getting her pregnant at seventeen. Before she was pregnant, his mother had big dreams of being a famous actress. When she realized she was pregnant, she had given up on her dream and gotten married to raise a family. He wished his mother had never gotten pregnant with him, either. Maybe, then, life would be different. He laughed. Well, he would have had no life.

The prison guard finally came. The guard said, "Time to go, you jerk! Any last words?" He shook his head. The guard continued, "In my opinion, lethal injection is too kind of a death for you. You should be shot a million times for what you have done."

He did not answer. But, silently he agreed. He followed the guard to the execution room. He wondered how many people had died in the room. Reading his mind, a man in a white suit said, "You will be the first one to die here. You will be my guinea pig." The man in the white suit laughed.

He laid down on the execution bed. At last, life would be over. He would not hurt anyone, anymore. He would not be hurt anymore. He felt a sense of calm for the first time that day. He felt really sleepy. He closed his eyes.

He felt the needle enter his vein. He opened his eyes and smiled. She had forgiven him for raping her. Maybe, now he can rest in peace.