The Learning Curve and Decisions of a Homeschooling Dad

When we made the decision to homeschool our children, we did not make it lightly. There were very concrete reasons for doing it including the lack of faith and security in the public school system. As serious as we were about doing it, we did not have a strategy either. I did not even know there were "different" ways to approach homeschooling. I had absolutely zero experience or knowledge of it. Montessori, unschooling and everything in between was very foreign to me. So, like any good homeschooling parent would do, I did my research.

We were originally blessed with the K-12 program. Then we found it extremely lacking. There was nothing wrong with the curriculum, it was well written and thorough, there just wasn't enough there. My children would blaze through a "weeks worth" of Language Arts in a single morning. We also were asked to use a pilot program called "Math-U-See". This, I thought after using it for six months, was a really good program. I never saw a K-12 math curriculum and have had nothing to compare the Math-U-See.

We had some communication problems with the State on the materials they were sending us compared to where my children "tested out" at. My 7 year-old who would have gone into the 2^nd grade in public school performed as a 3^rd grader. My daughter, who would be going into the 3^rd grade performed at the public school level of a 4^th grader. In the beginning I was proud of these statistics. However it did nothing but create a murky view of where we were supposed to start our children in the homeschool program. They sent us the books for a third and fourth grader. For example, history started at Julius Caesar, and I immediately had a problem with that. They had very little, if any, history taught to them in the public school system, and we were supposed to start at Caesar?

I say homeschool "program" because this is what I originally thought it was. I thought that you would teach the same subjects taught in public school at relatively the same pace. Boy, did I have a lot to learn. I searched out information on the internet and realized how huge and diverse homeschooling was. Montessori vs. Unschooling, competing curriculums and homeschooling groups; all with differing opinions or wanted your business.

I had been exposed to Montessori methods of teaching in the past, but had never heard of Unschooling. Through my own research and reading I really found them to be similar in many ways. Both have elements that I incorporate in my homeschooling and home. However, one-hundred percent child led learning was really a reach for me. I am a critical thinker and was falling into a trap of "deciding which philosophy I would teach my kids under," which seemed the opposite of what both categories preached.

Like most everything, I took from them what I wanted to incorporate. I am not on the band-wagon of either. My greatest fear when considering homeschooling was missing something. How do I make sure I teach everything they need to know? If you were to ask an "Unschooler", they would answer, "You don't worry about that, and they'll learn it when they need to."

Not me. My children might not need it, but I need some sort of curriculum, some sort of guidance, a plan. Believe me, like every homeschooling testimony I have read, we incorporate learning into every activity we do, whether it is in the home, outside the home, on vacation, whatever. I do believe that school is never out. However, I also can't believe that a child will let you know when they are ready to do fractions or algebra. I believe that it is our responsibility as homeschooling parents to introduce them to these subjects. All the responsibility is yours, to teach the children everything they need to know and my greatest fear is to fail them, to miss something crucial.

I was really stuck when reading more into Montessori learning and comparing it to unschooling. The website, montessori.edu states, "In the Montessori 3-6 class the environment is filled with cultural, artistic, scientific activities. There is no junk food, no television, " In my home we use everything available to learn from whether it is a computer, newspaper, television show, hike, trip to the store, or an old book off of their grandfather's bookshelf. Montessori was looking more like a recipe for a spoiled child.

In support of most of these home led learning methods, I am also a believer in "we go at our own pace". If there is a tough subject or a topic the children find exceptionally interesting, we will spend as much time on it as we need or want to. A good example was a history lesson from a few weeks back. They were totally engrossed in it. They couldn't get enough information, they loved it! So, we spent a lot of extra time on it (including videos from the library and internet research).

Again, like most homeschoolers will tell you, there is no "line" between subjects. I incorporate language arts into history lessons. Math and science often go hand in hand. My children write about the things they learn in science. It is all one grand learning experience and it is more important to discover how your child learns than to be so critical of when and how fast your child learns. Don't misinterpret me, I do not need a schedule to maintain, just a checklist so I don't miss anything.

I am becoming much more relaxed in homeschooling my children. Yes, I still have a spreadsheet with topics and lesson plans that I use to attempt some sort of structure. I am also very flexible and will skip the afternoon lesson plan to continue doing something they are interested in; there are no dates on my spreadsheet, only a direction to follow. A day spent snowshoeing in the winter can be a much better learning experience than sitting in the dining room for the fourth day in a row. Yet, those hours in the home are important too, the time spent there is just as critical to your children's success.

In the end, we did not start our history "curriculum" with Julius Caesar. We also started other curriculums where my children needed to start. I don't care where it puts them on the "public school measurement." I give my children choices, especially in history, art and music. My homeschooling philosophy has now morphed into: We don't exactly "do what we want" or "do what the kids want all the time", but we do go in the direction we want for however long it takes us to get there. Part of being a homeschooling parent is being a leader and choosing direction. Your children are not leaders...yet, but rest assured, they will be.