The Legal Profession: Lying for a Living

Inherit The Wind is one of my favorite movies of all times. You have Spencer Tracy fighting against the ignorance and intolerance of religious bias. Gene Kelly plays a cynical reporter who both despise and loves the world in which he lives, and of course Fred Murray who portrays a preacher who is the champion of the ignorance of man and its truly harmful results. The film has a cast of supporting characters that add a rare depth to a black and white film which relates well even after nearly 50 years.

When I was younger this was my introduction and belief as to what an attorney should be like, fighting for real rights, tackling meaningful issues and defending with righteous wrath against injustice, I was so, so wrong. Our legal profession is the bottom of the barrel for ethics and professional behavior and the law suits that are filed in this country border on lunacy.

Recently a man sued a strip club because he claimed he suffered from whiplash! Apparently this can happen when a stripper named Tawny Peaks wraps your head with her giant fake breasts. The jury rejected his demand of $15,000. I think they should have awarded him the $15,000 but paid him in single dollar bills. Tipping is so much easier that way. What is sad is that some attorney decided it was a good idea to represent him and file such a suit.

In January of 2000 Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amuck inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little boy was Ms. Robertson's own son. That means some attorney believed this woman case had some merit and filed it on her behalf, and I am sure he smiled all the way to the bank on this one.

There are hundreds and hundreds of such suits on the books and attorneys actually filed these claims, what has happened to this once illustrious profession? I know personally of a someone who breached a contract and the lawyers defense was "well yes we did breach it but only a little bit". Gosh what a grand, grand profession he belongs too. I wonder if that defense would work with other matters like, "Your honor if it please the court, I only got her a little bit pregnant".

And the reason they have become such bottom feeders is money, it is the only motivation for any of their actions, is it billable time? Is the major question on every legal firms mind. They don't even ask if they should file an action or even if their client is just greedy, they just see billable time. It is the only driving force for almost everything in our world anymore.

Isn't that special.